"Ding Dong——"
When the doorbell rang, Kabuda was using his robotic arm to draw a smiley face on toast. The red robot suddenly jumped up as if it had received an electric shock, and the poached egg that flew out of the omelette maker drew an elegant parabola in the air, with the egg yolk accurately smeared on the visitor's face—it was a sweeping robot wearing a postman's hat, and it was wiping the egg liquid on its face with a rag robotic arm.
"Mr. Kouenji Ryou, here's your admission letter to the Quantum Cooking Class." The robot's abdomen made a "ding" sound, indicating that the microwave was finished, and spit out an envelope that could dance tango. "Our school is certified by the Cosmic Gourmet Association. We guarantee teaching, assignment, and placement. Graduates can get priority tattoos of the interstellar Michelin tire man~"
Ryou had just opened the wax seal when the entire letter suddenly turned into a fluorescent green slime, crawling up his wrist to his shoulder and singing rap: "Yo! I heard you want to conquer the stars and the sea? Start by cutting onions first, don't slack off! You have to be good at cutting vegetables with a knife to capture the maid's stomach and love~"
Before everyone could react, the living room floor suddenly collapsed into a chocolate fountain. Tian Delina's maid's crinoline instantly expanded into a parachute, but was dyed pink by the cream swirl during the fall. Jingui Jiro tried to use a woodworking plane as a paddle, but the sawdust turned into chocolate chips that cursed: "You don't need paddles to row a boat - you rely on the waves!"
"Ahhh my new schoolbag!" Kuranosuke danced in the air, and the trigonometric formulas flying out of the exercise book were playing snake with the flying donuts. Sayuri's bow hairpin suddenly grew a propeller, dragging her around like a bamboo dragonfly: "Who will shut down this crazy world!"
When everyone fell on the breathing mousse cake floor, they found that the speed of time here was not right - the cockroach bully was stealing macarons in the corner at 0.5 times the speed, and the spider detective was weaving a "I was here" spider web signature on the cookie floor tiles at 2 times the speed.
"Welcome to my cooking class~"
Captain Dragonfly fell from the sky wearing a three-meter-high chef hat, with screaming pasta decorations on the brim of the hat. The scepter in his hand turned into a giant egg beater, splashing rainbow-colored egg liquid every time he waved it, and turned into a tap-dancing poached egg soldier when it landed.
"First! Never waste food!" The judge snapped his fingers, and five hundred bacon curtains fell from the ceiling. "Second! Never miss any teaching opportunity!" The refrigerator in the corner of the classroom suddenly grew limbs and began to dance mechanically. "Third! You must cultivate disciples who can shine!"
Wang Ye's system suddenly issued a piercing alarm. In his recalibrated vision, Captain Qinglong's chef uniform hid two entangled energy flows - the azure and gilded beams tore each other like DNA spirals, splitting the entire space into a mirror world.
[Energy fluctuations detected on Gemini Peace Star! ]
[Warning! Quantum superposition has covered a radius of 500 meters! ]
Xiao Rang's school uniform suddenly began to flash quantumly. The left half of his body was a cyberpunk outfit inlaid with LED tubes, while the right half of his body turned into a primitive animal skin skirt. The glasses on his nose were broken into two halves. The left lens displayed calculus formulas, and the right lens played the highlights of "Chinese Cooking Master Boy".
"I want to use Fourier transform to analyze the molecular structure of this tiramisu!"
"No! Let me lick the chocolate fountain first!" Xiao Ran's hands tore at himself uncontrollably. His left hand was holding a vernier caliper to measure the density of the mousse cake, and his right hand was stuffing cream into his nostrils.
Kabuda's situation was even worse. The red shell was flashing wildly between red and blue, and the mechanical joints made a "sizzling" sound like an old-fashioned TV changing channels. "Kabu...sizzling...Da...sizzling...want...sizzling...broken..." The display screen on the robot's chest popped up a full screen of garbled characters, and suddenly a cloud of mosaic smoke exploded with a "bang".
When the smoke dissipated, everyone gasped - there were two Kabudas standing there! On the left is the normal version, with a chef's hat in the shape of a pancake on his head; on the right is the dark version, all purple and black, with a mechanical arm modified into a spiked mace, and a death heavy metal smoky makeup on his face.
"Destroy! Stupid cooking world!" Dark Kabuda smashed the cooking table with a stick, and the flying ceramic fragments turned into knife-cut noodles that could curse the street, "I will let the world fall into eternal hunger!"
"Stop him!" Normal Kabuda just raised the frying pan to defend himself, and suddenly twenty rap-capable Dorayaki fell out of his apron pocket: "Yo! Brother, calm down and don't get carried away, violence can't solve thousands of worries!"
The whole classroom fell into a carnival of dual personalities. Jingui Jiro splits into a pink girl version, braiding a pigtail with a two-meter-long baguette: "A real man should master hairdressing skills~"; Tian Delina's maid outfit turns into a biker special attack uniform, riding a flame-breathing food motorcycle and knocking over a dessert tower: "Hand over Kuranosuke to me!"
The most outrageous is the cockroach bully - behind this villain robot, an angel halo version of himself emerges, feeding milk to a stray robot cat: "Be good, drink this cup of 95 gasoline and go save the world~" and the original body is moved by his own kindness and cries: "I... I actually have such a gentle side!"
"Stop it!" Wang Ye is going crazy in Peace Star. His system interface has split into four split screens: the upper left corner is seriously calculating energy conservation, the upper right corner is P cat ear emojis for everyone; the lower left corner plays a classic clip from "Midnight Diner", and the lower right corner uses Morse code to send an SOS distress signal.
Captain Dragonfly's scepter suddenly made a crisp sound of glass breaking, and Gemini Peace Star broke out of its cocoon! This star is like an entangled quantum ghost, and the blue and gold energy flow turned into two giant dragons biting above the classroom. Every collision caused space folds, tearing reality into a crack leading to another dimension.
"Look at the blackboard!" Sayuri screamed, and the blackboard that originally had a recipe written in ketchup was now oozing blue blood. The distorted handwriting formed a creepy reminder: [When the twins start dancing together, the world will usher in double the pain]
Dark Kabuda's mace suddenly pierced the space crack and hit Gemini Peace Star impartially. The star instantly burst into a supernova-level light, and everyone was knocked to the ground. Countless memory fragments emerged in the strong light-the strawberry jam that Xiaoran spilled when he was five years old, the ballet that Jingui Jiro secretly practiced, and even the girl's comics buried by the cockroach bully in the garbage dump.
When the vision was restored, the classroom turned into an absurd mirror maze. Each mirror image reflected the extreme form of split personality: Spider Detective's eight legs were writing papers on different subjects; Tian Delina's left and right halves were respectively a maid and a girl; the most terrifying was Captain Dragonfly - his left half kept the dignity of a referee, but his right half turned into a beach hottie in a bikini!
"This is fucking mental pollution!" Wang Ye's system popped up 999+ error reports. When he tried to restart, he suddenly received a mysterious signal - Dr. Kouenji's encrypted message was forcibly implanted in the form of a women's photo album!
The doctor in the holographic projection was wearing a Lolita dress and dancing a mechanical dance in the quantum rose garden: "When the thirteen constellations begin to resonate, the world will usher in the ultimate chef..." He suddenly posed as Sailor Moon transformed, "Koenji, who hides the power of women's clothing, show me your true attitude!"
Xiao Rang's three views were shattered into slag: "Grandpa, wake up! You have lost all the face of our family!"
"That's not the point!" Wang Ye suddenly noticed that the star map behind the doctor was flashing, "The arrangement of those star tracks... is the coordinates of Ophiuchus!" He immediately started the system scan, but found that to decrypt the coordinates, he needed to complete a perverted task-[Change all robots into women's clothes and take photos as a souvenir, and reward 2 points of original energy].
At the same time, Dark Kabuda had already killed to the core of the classroom. The mousse cake under his feet turned into magma, and wherever the mace went, the donuts turned into skulls and the puffs turned into poison gas bombs. Normal Kabuda was holding a frying pan and retreating step by step. All the sunny-side-up eggs that flew out of the omelette machine were made into devil omelettes by the dark version.
"Try my hell meteor hammer!" Dark Kabuda threw out a chain, and the end of it was tied to a durian covered with spikes! At the critical moment, the angel version of the cockroach bully suddenly appeared and formed a shield with takoyaki bamboo sticks: "The essence of cooking is to convey happiness!"
The moment the bamboo stick shield collided with the hell durian, a mushroom cloud with the smell of curry burst out. A glowing cooking elf flew out of the smoke and began to explain the battle situation with rap: "Yo! The dark cuisine here is going to be amazing, and the angels over there are playing tricks~"
Wang Ye took the opportunity to activate the emergency plan. He introduced the energy of the two peace stars into the system, and the quantum code galloped like a wild horse: [Administrator privilege upgrade detected] [Unlock the Gemini clone skill]. The glass jar exploded with a "bang", and two Wang Ye walked out of it - the rational version in a white coat and the salted fish version in beach pants.
"Calculate the energy neutralization formula immediately!" Rational Wang Ye drew a complex matrix in the air.
"First, give Captain Dragonfly a bunny ear!" Salty Wang Ye was uploading an emoticon package to the system.
Under the dual operation, the classroom began to tremble violently. All mirror personalities were sucked into the quantum vortex, and the Gemini Peace Star made a humming sound like a whine. When the light reached its peak, Dr. Kouenji's projection suddenly took out a magic wand: "Now! Save the world with love and women's clothing!"
Xiao Ran and Kuranosuke jumped up at the same time and pressed the two Peace Stars towards the star map. The Milky Way collapsed into a donut shape in their hands, and thirteen sets of women's clothing floated out from the central black hole - sailor suits, Gothic lolita clothes, cheongsams, everything. When the last maid costume returned to its place, the melody of "Love Cycle" sounded throughout the universe.
"No——!" Dark Kabuda returned to his original form with a scream, and the angel cockroach bully disappeared in tears. All abnormal phenomena began to rewind: the spilled curry flew back into the pot, the chopped onions were reassembled, and even the cream in Xiaorang's nostrils flowed back into the fountain.
When everyone returned to the real world, it was already the next morning. Kabuda was sleeping soundly with a burnt poached egg on his head, and Jingui Jiro was holding a baguette and talking in his sleep: "A real man should..." Tian Delina's maid outfit was covered with unknown sauce, and Captain Dragonfly was squatting in the corner drawing circles - his scepter turned into an egg beater.
Wang Ye in the attic looked at the system interface that had returned to calm, and suddenly a new message popped up: [Congratulations on obtaining Gemini administrator privileges] [Unlocked skills: Quantum Tucao]. He looked at the rising sun and suddenly heard Xiaorang's screams downstairs:
"Kabuda! Why are there women's clothing designs all over my math homework book!"
The red robot scratched his head sleepily: "Maybe it's a quantum sequelae? Kabu~"