---
The Abandoned Sect, formerly known as a glorified garbage heap with ambitions of greatness, now resembled something slightly more legitimate. A skeletal structure of the Cultivation Tower stood proudly—by which I mean, it stood nervously, swaying in the wind like it was constantly reconsidering its life choices.
Pan-Pan was meditating atop a ladder made of unstable bamboo. Xu Liang had just fallen off the roof for the seventh time this morning, leaving behind an outline in the dirt shaped exactly like a confused radish.
Wei Yun stood at the tower's base, arms crossed. "Status report?"
Yu Shuang beamed, covered in sawdust and questionable confidence. "We've finished 2.3 floors. The tower leans 17 degrees to the left, 8 to the right when it's windy, and 100% toward inevitable destruction when Mu Yao starts brewing."
Mu Yao, unbothered and busy preparing her latest batch of "Spiritual Instant Noodles of Explosive Qi Infusion," raised a bubbling pot. "This batch will either restore your qi or erase your soul. Fifty-fifty odds!"
Crutchy stumbled over with a scroll in one hand and an eldritch-looking chicken in the other. "Master, we have a problem. A haunted one."
Wei Yun blinked. "What."
"Turns out, the land we 'borrowed' to build the tower was once a cursed battlefield where rogue cultivators tried to ascend by sacrificing goats to a misunderstood Dao of Flatulence."
"Excuse me—"
"The land's haunted by angry ghosts… and possibly demonic goats."
Wei Yun slowly turned to look at the Cultivation Tower.
It was glowing faintly purple. The wind howled. A goat screamed somewhere in the distance.
"...Of course it is."
---
> [System Alert: Your sect construction has disturbed the Sealed Ghost of the Wailing Alchemist. He is extremely cranky, lactose-intolerant, and allergic to poor craftsmanship.]
[Mission: Exorcise the Ghost or Offer it a Satisfactory Home Upgrade]
"We can't fight a ghost with sticks and loud shouting," Wei Yun said.
Pan-Pan raised a hand. "I can fight him with interpretive dance and deep bamboo wisdom."
"Denied."
Crutchy coughed, flipping through the haunted scroll. "It says here the ghost will rest peacefully if we complete the tower's Grand Spirit-Infused Roof Formation of Eternal Comfort. Apparently, it needs precisely aligned tiles, twelve spirit lanterns, and an extremely rare artifact known as the 'Cushion of Undying Naps.'"
Mu Yao dropped her pot. "A cushion? Like... a pillow?"
"A sacred pillow," Crutchy corrected. "Stuffed with phoenix feathers and eldritch sheep fluff."
Wei Yun pinched his nose. "Why is everything in cultivation either haunted, cursed, or mildly insane?"
"Because, Master," Yu Shuang said proudly, "we're in the right business."
---
The only known 'Cushion of Undying Naps' was in the possession of a rogue sect known as the Dream Cloud Sect, whose entire focus revolved around napping, daydreaming, and aggressively ignoring world events.
"Perfect," Wei Yun said. "Let's break in."
The infiltration was surprisingly smooth. Mainly because the Dream Cloud Sect's disciples were all asleep.
Crutchy guided them through rooms filled with gentle snoring. Mu Yao had to be dragged away from the Eternal Nap Sauna, where she nearly joined the sect out of sheer relaxation.
Eventually, they reached the Pillow Vault.
Only one challenge remained.
Guarding the cushion... was a divine sheep. With glowing red eyes. And the aura of a 9th-stage Dao Beast.
"Baaaaa," it growled, its wool shimmering with Dao runes.
Wei Yun stared at the creature.
"I'll distract it," Pan-Pan whispered. "You grab the pillow."
"How?"
"I'll recite the Dao of Bamboo Silence."
Five minutes later, the sheep was asleep. Apparently, Pan-Pan's voice was so boring it worked as a spiritual sedative.
Wei Yun snatched the pillow, Crutchy dropped a thank-you note, and they ran.
---
Back at the sect, the disciples completed the Grand Spirit Roof. The sacred pillow was placed at the summit.
A sudden pulse of energy surged through the Cultivation Tower.
Ghostly laughter echoed through the night. Then—silence.
The purple glow vanished. The tower stood upright. Strong. Glorious. Mysteriously humming the tune of an old lullaby.
> [System Notification: Cultivation Tower of Madness – Level 1 Constructed]
[+1 to Sect Reputation. +5 to Internal Chaos. -1 to Goat Population.]
Wei Yun stared in awe. "We actually did it…"
Yu Shuang jumped into the air. "We have a tower! It's crooked, haunted, and made of regret—but it's ours!"
"Correction," Crutchy added. "It's now a Spirit-Class Structure."
Wei Yun laughed. "We've gone from sleeping in rubble... to sleeping in semi-haunted, structurally questionable luxury!"
The entire sect celebrated that night.
Pan-Pan played a bamboo flute. Xu Liang accidentally blew up a spirit chicken. Mu Yao set off fireworks shaped like mushrooms. Crutchy danced with a mop.
And Wei Yun? He stood atop the Cultivation Tower, arms spread wide.
"This is just the beginning," he whispered. "The world laughed at us. Now, they'll scream."
The Cultivation Tower's roof creaked ominously in agreement.
---
Morning came with... problems.
A messenger bird crash-landed at the tower's base, screeching as it delivered a bloodstained scroll.
Wei Yun caught it, opened it, and frowned.
> To the Master of the "Abandoned Sect,"
You have insulted fate, disturbed karma, and stolen a cursed pillow that rightfully belonged to the Sacred Sheep of Slumber.
Prepare to be annihilated.
– Signed, the Cultivation Alliance's Bureau of Mildly Inconvenienced Sect Management.
"Oh no," Crutchy whispered. "You got on their list."
"What list?"
"The 'Annoying But Not Worth Full Eradication' list."
Mu Yao peered over his shoulder. "That's the worst one. They just harass you endlessly until you go insane."
Wei Yun narrowed his eyes. "Then we'll just have to go insane first."
---
> [Next Mission Unlocked: Defend Your Tower from Inspectors, Inspectors Who Explode, and the Inspectors Who Sue]
[Bonus Quest: Recruit More Disciples to Expand Your Madness]
[Side Quest: Teach Xu Liang to Walk Without Accidentally Summoning Lightning]
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