In the first three days of being in the cell, it didn't feel too unbearable. She had solved the basic problems of eating and sleeping, and there were fellow inmates to chat with, all sharing similar misfortunes. But as time went on, Kagura grew increasingly restless. Not only could she not bathe, but one night she even saw a rat larger than her hand dart past her with a "whoosh." From that moment on, she became desperate to get out.
Wanting to leave was one thing, but whether she could was another. As the days dragged on, she began to feel a sense of weariness creeping in. She could only pass the endless boredom by idly chatting with her cellmates.
What kind of situation was this? She had read over a hundred time-travel novels, and not a single protagonist had been as pitiful as her. First, she died twice after arriving in this world, and now she was stuck in prison. What kind of karma had she accumulated?
"Gods, please let me out! I swear I'll balance my diet with both meat and vegetables for the rest of my life, and I won't break this promise!"
But the Gods didn't hear her plea, and she remained locked up.
A few days later, Kagura suddenly realized that she had traveled into a Japanese anime. If she was going to pray, she should probably be asking Japanese deities for help. Who were the Japanese gods? Amaterasu, Tsukuyomi, Susanoo?
"Amaterasu, Tsukuyomi, Susanoo-no-Mikoto, I swear I'll balance my diet with both meat and vegetables for the rest of my life, just please let me out!"
As expected, it didn't work. If gods were effective, the prison would have been empty long ago.
With nothing else to do, she continued to listen to gossip and information about the ninja world. Otherwise, she feared that by the time Tobirama remembered to release her, she would already have developed dementia.
From the conversations with her cellmates, Kagura learned a lot about this world and its secrets. For example, how Hashirama Senju married Mito Uzumaki, the peculiar hobbies of the daimyo, which countries were on friendly terms, and which shop on the street had the best dango...
Most of it was fine, but Kagura couldn't help but roll her eyes at the person who claimed to know which dango was the best. Wasn't dango just made from pounded rice? How could there be such distinctions as excellent, good, and passable?
Let's talk about something else!
"So, did Madara Uchiha really leave the village because he didn't get along with Hashirama?"
"Yeah, Lord Madara was practically a warmonger. He was always itching for a fight. Who in his clan would want to give up a peaceful life to follow him into constant battles?"
Is that really how it was? Kagura felt a bit disappointed.
"Huh, I thought he left because he was jealous that Hashirama got married."
Her cellmate gave her a strange look.
"The Hokage already has several children. What about the Second Hokage? Does he have any kids?" In the anime, Tobirama didn't seem to have any descendants. Could it be true that he had no children?
"Who's the Second Hokage?"
Oh right, at this point, Tobirama hadn't succeeded as Hokage yet, so it was no wonder they didn't understand.
"I mean Lord Tobirama. Does he have any children?"
"Kids don't just fall from the sky. He doesn't even have a wife, so how could he have children?"
Kagura couldn't help but laugh.
"Exactly! Did you think kids grow like melons? Plant one in the ground in spring, and by summer, one pops out on a vine?"
"Then..." Kagura's eyes sparkled mischievously. "He's not getting any younger, is he? Maybe he's just not up to it in that department. Otherwise, I can't think of any reason why he hasn't gotten married yet."
It made sense. After all, Senju Tobirama was from the prestigious Senju clan, one of the founding families of Konoha. His brother was the Hokage, and he himself held significant power behind the scenes. In the real world, he would be the ultimate golden bachelor, the number one on every girl's must-marry list. Handsome, wealthy, and powerful—yet, to everyone's surprise, he remained single.
"N-not up to it?!" A woman's voice trembled from a corner. "What do you mean... not up to it?"
The moment she asked, Kagura instantly regretted her words. It was one of those things that was better left unsaid.
"How do I explain it? It's, well, that thing..... he is impotent"
The women in this world might not understand what "not up to it" referred to, but the men certainly did.
The thought of the usually stern and imposing Tobirama being inadequate in that area was too much for the men in the cell. They tried to hold back their laughter but eventually burst into uncontrollable fits.
"So Lord Tobirama isn't up to it, huh? Hahahaha! I always wondered why he never married, despite his age."
"Exactly! Her words finally solved the mystery that's been bugging me for years."
"Pfft, thinking about it this way makes me feel better. My son already a genius!"
They didn't care whether Kagura speculation was true or not. To them, it didn't matter. A minor flaw in an otherwise perfect person was their most direct impression of Tobirama. Trapped in the dark, gloomy cell, fantasizing about being superior to someone so high and mighty in some way was their version of a psychological victory.
In reality, Kagura cell wasn't for serious criminals. Many were there for minor disputes or misunderstandings, and those like Kagura, who posed a potential threat, were in the minority. This meant that some of them would be released soon.
Then, one day, after the gossip about Tobirama 'impotent' had spread throughout Konoha, the man himself appeared outside Kagura cell, seething with anger.
In the darkness, Tobirama blood-red eyes were unreadable, his strikingly handsome face more serious than a client nitpicking over details. He stood there, his presence towering at least eight feet tall, making Kagura feel uneasy.
After all, from Kagura perspective, this could only mean that Tobirama had come up with a new way to torture her, to extract information about her identity. Her heart raced with anxiety.
"Why are you staring at me like that? It's creepy," Kagura shrank further into the corner.
Tobirama looked down at her, his gaze as sharp and cold as the winter wind. "I heard the rumors you've been spreading about me."
Tobirama looked down at her, his brow deeply furrowed, and the corner of his mouth twitched slightly—a sign that he was barely containing his anger.
"Hey," he spoke, his voice like the clinking of crystal.
"Was it you who spread the rumor that I, that I..."
"That you what?" She was in a cell, so the term "everywhere" seemed a bit exaggerated.
Kagura looked at him, puzzled.
"That I'm... inadequate in a certain way!" As soon as he finished the sentence, Kagura saw Tobirama face flush red. The cell was dim, but she could see it clearly.
The fellow inmates pricked up their ears to listen to their conversation, even holding their breaths for fear of missing a single word.
So that's what it was. Kagura breathed a sigh of relief and laughed heartily. "No, that was just a conjecture, a reasonable inference based on facts. We haven't made a final conclusion. To be precise, we don't actually know whether you can or not. So, you can't just label me like that."
After Kagura's "sophistry," the usually composed Tobirama brows furrowed so tightly they almost formed a knot. His eyes were tightly shut, giving off a vibe that he was about to explode.
"Hey, hey, don't get angry. If you get angry, it just proves my conjecture is correct. Isn't it said that people only jump when their sore spot is poked? Speaking of which..." Kagura suddenly looked at Tobirama suspiciously, her gaze eventually landing hesitantly on a certain spot.
"You're not really..."
"Kagami!"
Before Kagura could finish, Tobirama interrupted her. At his call, a strikingly handsome young man emerged from a dim corner.
Kagami, if I'm not mistaken, this must be Uchiha Kagami. Indeed, the Uchiha clan is known for producing handsome men.
"Lord Tobirama."
"Take her to my office," Tobirama shot Kagura a deadly glare, but seeing how filthy she was, he rolled his eyes. "Never mind, take her to my residence instead."
"Huh?!"
"Yes."
Kagami went to fetch the keys from the guard. Tobirama didn't want to stay a moment longer and turned to leave, but Kagura called out from behind.
"What are we going to your residence for? Let me make it clear, no private punishments, or I'll report you!"
"Hmph!" Tobirama sneered, then suddenly laughed. To Kagura, his laughter seemed a bit sinister. "Didn't you question whether I can get it up or not? Why don't you try it yourself?"
Kagura froze on the spot. Was he implying what she thought he was implying? Right? Right?
"This... isn't this a bit too hasty?"
"Lord Tobirama, you don't have to prove this to me. If you say you can, then you can. If you say you can do it seven times in one night, I'll believe you. There's no need for verification."
"We should always seek truth from facts. How can we know if it's true without verification?" At this moment, Kagami returned with the keys. Tobirama glanced at Kagura and said in a deep voice, "Take her away."
Tobirama left first. The cell door was opened, and Kagami, being quite the gentleman, simply gestured for her to proceed without laying a hand on her.
Kagura remained huddled in the corner, showing no intention of moving. Her smile was uglier than a cry, and she stammered something.
"I think this cell is quite nice. Staying here a bit longer wouldn't be so bad. Why don't you go ahead?" By the end, she almost seemed resigned. "Just leave me here to fend for myself..."
Kagami smiled faintly. "That won't do, Miss Kagura. Please, come along. Lord Tobirama has a bit of a temper. If he waits too long..." He didn't finish, but the implication was clear—there would be consequences.
Reluctantly, Kagura leaned against the wall to stand up, wearing a look of grim determination as she prepared to leave.
She walked ahead, with Kagami following behind. As they left the cell, Kagura heard the wailing of a woman.
"My Lord Tobirama!"
Ah, this woman must be Tobirama simp. What a pity.