Noah blinked awake to the soft chime of a digital bell that didn't belong to any device in his room. He sat up, rubbing his eyes. It was his eighteenth birthday, and all he'd expected was maybe a half-hearted cake emoji from his mom, and a few messages from old friends and classmates pretending they cared. What he hadn't expected was—
[Welcome to the Ultimate Harem System.]
The glowing blue text hovered in the air before him, pulsing like it had a heartbeat. Noah stared at it, then looked around, half expecting a prank projector. "Okay, who the hell is doing this? Are you filming me motherfucker for some fucked up reel?" he muttered. No answer. Only another message popped up with a soft ding.
[System Initiated. Congratulations, Noah. You are now eligible to form a Harem Contract.]
"…A what contract?"
The next message didn't wait for consent.
[New Trait Unlocked: Shared Progression.]
[New Trait Unlocked: Tenfold Investment Return.]
[New Objective: Find your first wife.]
Noah choked on his own spit. "Wife? I don't even have a girlfriend!"
A wave of warmth surged through his body. For a moment, the world seemed more vivid, his desk's scratches sharper, the dust in the sunlight more golden. And the system screen was still flashing in front of him.
Noah's brain felt like it had been thrown into a blender. What the hell was happening? Did he get into some sort of accident and now become delusional? Did he die from an earthquake in his sleep, and was he currently dreaming in his coma?
So many crazy theories popped up, all of which seemed to have a high chance of being true. His brain was going crazy. Thankfully, a loud knock on the door snapped him out of his mental shitfest.
He walked over to the door, dazed and confused. He opened it to find a delivery girl standing in front of him. It was coincidentally his classmate Lizzie. "Hi Noah, happy birthday!" She extended a parcel to him.
"Ughh. Ya." Noah absent-mindedly accepted it. It was probably from his mother's secretary. Good for her. This year also she managed to send him a cake without forgetting. A cake from a mother who couldn't bother to even call him or pick up his call on his birthday. Sure. Why not?
Noah took the cake and tossed it onto the side casually. "How much do I owe you?"
Lizzie smiled timidly. "It's already paid."
"Ok, thanks." Noah was about to close the door when an unexpected system prompt flashed in front of him.
[Harem Candidate Detected: Elizabeth Myra – Compatibility: 92%]
Huh? Noah opened and closed his mouth speechlessly. This girl? He looked at the ordinary girl standing in front of him again. She was plain plain-looking girl who wore big glasses and a gaudy baggy shirt, and a pair of torn jeans.
She was not particularly ugly, but at the same time, she was not exactly a knockout either. She was just... average. Utterly, completely, undeniably average. And the system was telling him she was a 'Harem Candidate' with 92% compatibility?
He stared at Lizzie, then back at the floating text, his mind reeling. Lizzie shifted uncomfortably under his intense gaze, her timid smile faltering. "Ok. I am going then. Happy birthday." She uncomfortably spoke again and quickly turned to leave.
"Wait. Wait." Noah immediately called after her. He still did not know what the hell was happening to him, but this woman seemed as good as any to test this new system out.
'System!' He mentally called out. 'You mentioned that I can get 10X return on investment. Does it mean if I spend 10 bucks on her, I will get 100 in return?'
[Ding! Yes. That would be correct. The system congratulates the host for adapting quickly and thinking on their feet.]
Noah immediately took out a crumpled ten-dollar note from his table and handed it to Lizzie. "Hey, thanks for delivering this."
Lizzie was slightly taken aback to see a ten-dollar tip for a small delivery, but she accepted with a smile and quickly turned to leave.
As Lizzie disappeared down the stairwell, Noah barely managed to shut the door before another notification smacked him in the face.
[Investment Confirmed: $10 → Beneficiary: Elizabeth Myra][Calculating Return...]
[Ding! Investment deemed invalid. The host is required to purchase an item or service worth the amount to receive the returns. Direct monetary compensation is not considered for rewards.]
"What the hell now?" Noah stared dumbfoundedly at the screen.
The system, ever patient and maddeningly cheerful, flashed another line of text.
[Clarification: Investments must enhance the target's happiness, development, or life quality. Money given directly does not qualify unless accompanied by value or meaning.]
Noah groaned and slapped his forehead. "So just handing someone cash like I'm their sugar daddy doesn't count?"
[Correct. Emotional intent and context matter. Suggested Action: Purchase something thoughtful.]
"So what? I am supposed to ask her out on a date or give a gift to her in person?" Noah's brain short-circuited just thinking about it. He was never good with women to begin with. He had never really mustered up the courage to actually try and talk to someone he liked.
And now, just like that, he was supposed to buy something and give her in person? What the hell? Nope. No way. Nope.
He walked over to his window to check if Lizzie had left. This girl was here now, and she was alone and a lot easier to talk to. This was the best chance he was going to get. But there was no one around, and she had probably left.
Noah's eyes then landed on the cake box. Where did she work again? The next second, he picked up his phone and made another call to the bakery shop. This time he had to try better.