Song recommendation (Doubts by twenty one pilots)
When he got out, the floor was empty, he guessed it was private to him and Silke.
He took the elevator, pressing the button, he was heading to the fifth floor, maybe there would be some crowd there.
He leaned against the wall, today he had woken up to see himself in bed with a man.
He had only ever been with women, he couldn't believe, he was just as soft as a woman, despite having a man's body.
"This is so fucked up. If only I hadn't awakened as an Esper."
Ding!
The elevator opened and just as he thought, this floor was more crowded then the one he was coming from.
As he walked to who knows where? He was welcomed with sharp stares and whispers. He kdidn't know if it was his ability but he could hear each and every one of them.
"I heard he's an SSS-ranked Esper, no wonder S agreed to guide him."
"He took down three buildings, there was so much casualties. I healed so much, my fingers felt numb."
"You think he's going to go rogue like X? Even having S as a partner, he still couldn't be contained."
"SSS ranked are always trouble, I wish they'll just die."
Seram eyes widened, he stopped and his eyes followed the voice. The girl gasped and walked away.
"Ah." Seram fingers ran through his hair, they hated SSS-ranked Espers, he clenched his fists and the room began to shake, the espers and guides there all shifting uncomfortably, some even fainting.
"Get S, he's out of control again.."
Seram sighed as a breath escaped his lips, he really didn't like people.
"Hey…relax. All people do is talk, I didn't think you were the type to let words get to you."
"I'm not perfect, why are you here?"
The suppressive air had slowed dispersed, using his eyes, Silke had told the other guides and Espers to disperse.
"Now that you're here, let's meet Kyren..I was about to hand him your report."
Seram's eyes widened, why was Silke still being nice to him? He had looked down on him, be rude, yet he still came out to calm him down and try to ease the air.
"I'm sorry."
Silke paused, what was he saying sorry for? It wasn't his fault if he couldn't carry his abilities yet.
"It's okay, all the members do is talk."
".."
"No, that's not what I'm apologizing for. I'm sorry I was rude to you, I'm sorry I looked down on you and said your body wasn't worth it."
Silke raised a brow, that was new, an Esper apologizing.
"You're actually a good boy huh… I'm not angry at you, I've experienced worse."
"…"
"Does my abilities affect you too?" Seram asked, his tone had changed completely now.
"Of course it does. I'm not not above death, I'm just a guide."
Silke turned to walk but Seram grabbed his hand, he looked like he still had burning questions to ask so he dragged him along with him.
"If you have questions, we can talk about them on the way."
Seram looked at their hands slightly, he thought he would be repulsed by the sight of holding hands with another man.
"What happened to your previous partners?"
"Most of them are dead, others went rogue. As an SSS-ranked guide I've been ranked the worst guide in history. Funny isn't it. People always make it seems I'm the one at fault, all the espers mistakes end up becoming my fault.."
"Did you love them?"
"When it comes to the matters of the heart, if it gets broken once it will build walls around itself…to protect it."
"Why not stop being a guide?"
"I can't, this building protects me. A guide without an Esper becomes everyone's guide. I don't want that…"
"…"
"Have you guided more than one Esper at a time before?"
Silke stopped walking and sighed, he really couldn't enjoy his twenties could he.
"I guided 4 at once. Society favors Espers, guides eventually are coerced to work with them. They'll say you're not guiding anyone right now, or the fate of the world is in your hands, they make us look filthy in the eye of our partners."
Seram didn't say anything. He just listened. Maybe for the first time in his life, he felt like listening.
"I don't hate Espers," Silke added, eyes facing forward, "but I hate what this society turns them into. What it turns us into."
"Did you ever… want to go rogue?" Seram asked.
Silke turned his head slightly. His steps didn't slow.
"There were days I thought about it. But I don't like the idea of losing. If I go rogue, they win. I'm just another broken Guide."
Seram didn't understand everything, but he understood that feeling, of not wanting to lose.
Of wanting to be remembered for something. Even if it came at a cost.
They reached a room. The door was half-open, someone was already inside.
"That's Kyren," Silke said. "He's a Guide and a trainer. He'll be in charge of your basic ability control."
Seram paused at the door. He didn't know why he suddenly felt nervous.
Silke tilted his head. "What, are you scared now?"
"I just… don't want to embarrass myself."
"You already did," Silke said, smirking. "So don't worry, there's no pride left to lose."
Seram glanced at him, unsure if he should feel offended or not.
"You're really bad at comforting people."
"I'm not here to comfort you. I'm here to guide you."
He gave him a little push. Seram stepped into the room.
"There you are!"
The man standing by the window turned around, his long hair catching the light. It swayed gently with his movement, so smooth it looked like it belonged in a shampoo commercial.
His face was delicate, beautiful even. His smile wide and genuine, eyes crinkling at the corners.
If Seram didn't know any better, he'd have thought he walked into the wrong room.
"You must be Seram! I've been waiting all morning to meet you."
Seram froze by the door, blinking a few times. The voice was deep, unmistakably male, but his face, that waist, those lashes..
"Are you… Kyren?"
The man grinned. "Mhm. Though most people think I'm his sister at first glance. It's the hair, right?"
Silke didn't answer. He just stepped aside, motioning Seram further in. "Your trainer," he said simply. "S class Guide. He's in charge of your practicals."
Kyren crossed the room in a few steps, hand outstretched. "I know it's a lot right now, but don't worry. I'm good with rough types. We'll ease into it."
Seram stared at the hand before eventually shaking it. The grip was firm, warm, and somehow comforting.
"I thought you'd be… different," Seram muttered under his breath.
Kyren laughed. "Let me guess. More scars? More yelling?"
Seram didn't answer.
"You're not the first to think that. But I'm good at what I do. Silke wouldn't have assigned me otherwise."
Silke leaned against the doorframe, arms folded. "He's annoying, but effective."
"Aww. You flatter me."
Seram glanced between them, unsure how to feel.
"Relax," Kyren said, noticing the stiffness.
"You won't be throwing cars on your first day. I just want to see where your control's at. Maybe float a few things, test your reactions, see if the building survives."
Seram's brows twitched. "That's supposed to make me feel better?"
"Would it help if I said I'll hold your hand through it?" Kyren winked, then turned to Silke.
"You staying?"
Silke shook his head. "He's yours now."
Seram flinched at the wording, eyes narrowing slightly, but Silke had already turned to leave.
Kyren tilted his head and smiled. "Well then, partner. You ready to find out what that pretty head of yours can do?"
Seram followed him silently. He didn't like people.