Chapter 4: I Accidentally Became a Radio Guest
You know your life is in chaos when you wake up famous—and not for anything good.
It all started when I walked into a building I thought was the venue for a "Youth Empowerment Breakfast." The flyer said "Free food, free mentorship, big vibes." You already know I came for the jollof.
But somewhere between the front desk and my nose leading me to the smell of sausage rolls, I took a wrong turn. That's when a man in a headset shoved a mic in my face and said:
"Quick quick, you're on in 30 seconds."
I tried to protest, but he said,
"Bro! You're the financial literacy guy, right? The one who went from broke to billionaire selling grasshoppers?"
I blinked. "...Yes?"
And just like that, I was live on 99.7 FM, explaining to thousands of Ghanaians how "insects are the new investment strategy."
I don't even like grasshoppers. I fear them.
I said things like:
> "The insect economy is booming."
"Insects don't cheat you like humans."
"Buy low, jump high. That's what grasshoppers do."
People started calling in. One woman said she wanted to quit her bank job to chase locusts full time. A man asked if grasshoppers could be trained to find gold. I panicked and said, "With prayer, yes."
The host shook my hand afterward.
"You're a genius. We need you back next week."
I ran.
They're still looking for me.