|Tom's Farm| 24.03.1178|
Naomi:
I really hate my mind sometimes.
I'm standing on the banks of the Great River of Malistia. The river that flows through Malistia, Ilyar, and Keltapne.
So why is it still called the Great River of Malistia?
Honestly, I don't think even the people who named it that know why.
If another person were to come here, they would certainly be impressed by the view. This river has almost something alive about it.
And no, I don't mean that it just moves very, very fast and furiously, which it does.
It's almost as if the river is talking to you. No forest, no stone, no sand. Nothing disturbs the flow of this river.
Everything is about 100 meters distant from it, as if they have turned away from it out of self-interest, as if the river itself were something that can only exist for itself. The grass, despite being wild grass, is extremely short, and in some places it doesn't even reach the back of my knees.
Due to the absence of trees, this other person probably can't hear birdsong either. I'm just going to assume this person isn't a demi-human.
This other person would simply see a river.
A river that is fascinating both in color and clarity, as well as in the pure soundscape of rushing, trickling, and flowing.
But for me, this place is much more than a river. It's the birthplace of my memory. The place where Tom found me.
The Aeth Lands are located northeast of Malistia on the map of Eldoria. The Great River of Malistia begins in Keltapne, which is west of Malistia, and runs through the Delcan Mountains, along the border between Malistia and Keltapne.
In other words, I've always been 90% sure I'm not from the Aeth Lands.
For me to have a dream now, in which I have an almost picture-perfect life with people I don't know, but still see as my parents, is simply a game of my mind.
Maybe to distract me from all the shit that's happening right now.
And so I kept thinking. As I made my way toward that river, I thought about what could have caused this dream.
It's pretty obvious that in dreams, you process information that you picked up during the day and couldn't consciously process.
But what was that? That was the question I kept repeating in my head while I was still in the Karabul stable. I wasn't really thinking, which is another reason why I hate my mind.
I just kept repeating the question in my head over and over again.
And I don't know. I think I was just too high to remember it properly. But there was something that could have caused it. Maybe it was the encounter with the wyvern. The failure of the anima spell.
Something.
But that doesn't matter now. My feet move through the grass, now completely at the edge of the river.
Almost so close that it might resemble a suicide attempt.
I don't know how quickly another person would have figured that out, and the answer to that question will probably be quite humiliating for me. But there was a very, very simple way to check whether the dream was true or not. Whether anything about this dream was true or not.
Whether I really lived a life like my dream before this place, before the birthplace of my current memory, the Malistia River.
I have to recreate one of the spells my father so wonderfully brought to light in my dream.
My hair floats gently as a breeze hits me from the right. I take a deep breath.
> > Gestic spells don't work randomly. I can't just make up handsigns and something will result out of it—that's not how it works. So, if a spell I'm unfamiliar with somehow works, it means I've seen it before—I've encountered it already somewhere. <<
I close my eyes to remember his movements in detail.
I clap my hands, seperate them again, form a fist with the left hand and touch the back of it with the index and middle finger of the right hand. Then I clap again, afterwards turning the extended fingers upwards and laying the left hand on the back of my right hand.
The handsigns are done. For the split of a second, nothing happens—but then—
A blue flame almost explodes from between the two fingers, causing me to stumble back and fall on my back.
The fire has vanished once I reach the ground.
"What the—"
I feel a lump in my throat, my whole body starting to tingle and my eyes widening to an extent that seemed impossible for me before.
A scream escapes my lips, as I clasp my hands tightly together, not quite knowing which emotion is rising from me.
A faint rattle fills the air—it grows louder, way louder than the flowing river. I spin around but see nothing that could be the source of the noise.
The volume increase does not seem to stop and I cover my ears while starting to slump to my knees.
A dizziness fills my whole body, making it hard for me to even keep my eyes open.
> > What is happe— <<
RATATATATATA
The rattle breaks my track of thoughts, almost invading my brain. Tears form in my eyes. My breathing gets even harsher and I can't help but hold my head in confusion.
> > Is this how it feels to use mana for the first time? Or is it the impleca— <<
RATATATATATATATATATAT
My whole body starts to heat up, the cold sweat clinging to my skin like a muddy veil.
This is bad... Real bad.
"One stair down, huh? Eleven left to go~"
A soft, velvety voice breaks through the rattle. Calming my senses and easing the pain... no, healing it... fixing it.
The river's sound fills my senses again. A bird lands in front of me, tilting its tiny head in confusion.
The rattling has stopped.
I let out a harsh, shaky breath.
I swallow, not feeling the lump in my throat anymore.
I let out another breath, my nostrils flaring—yes, it's definitely going to rain soon.
I get up, running a hand through my dark gray hair.
I then let out a soft, almost hoarse chuckle.
> > What was tha— <<
My eyes roll slightly at the question I was yet to utter—I really hate my mind sometimes.