Thank God I made it back home—alive.
I slammed the door shut behind me, every nerve in my body screaming from the pain. Two weeks. At least two weeks before I'd feel human again, I thought bitterly. But what gnawed at me most wasn't the pain—it was the question that refused to leave my head: Who the hell would want to attack me?
I dragged myself to the mirror and regretted it instantly. My reflection was a horror show. Blood clotted on my skin, bruises blossoming across my body, and my face… shit. It looked like I'd been run over by a truck. I inspected my arms, ribs, everything—no broken bones, but enough damage to make me want to crawl into a hole and stay there for days.
Sunghoon's gonna lose it when he sees me like this.
I pictured his face, shaking his head with that half-smirk. He'd say something like, "Told ya, Bohyun! A chaebol like you needs to toughen up. See? Your hard work paid off. You're still breathing, even though you look like you've been dragged through a garbage truck."
That brat. Sunghoon was the one who forced me into the gym back in high school. I never wanted to do it, but he wouldn't shut up until I gave in. Said it'd keep me off the bullies' radar, especially after everything went down with my family. I hated him for being right. Even though that didn't help me tonight. I couldn't let myself beat up kids. I had to take hits from them. I had focused on just that one guy. There was no way he was a school kid. I sustained as much as I could.
My phone buzzed, snapping me back. A text:
"All freshmen are required to attend tomorrow's welcome party at the Department Hall after classes."
I groaned. Seriously? The last thing I needed was to parade myself in front of strangers, looking like I'd been to war and lost. Even if my face weren't wrecked, I wasn't the type for parties. Of course, knowing Sunghoon, he'd drag my half-dead body there anyway. The guy had no chill.
Grimacing, I slathered some ointment over the worst of the cuts. Bandages followed, covering what felt like a thousand wounds. Honestly, it'd be easier to wrap myself like a mummy at this point. I sighed as I remembered the street fight—ten-on-one, and somehow I survived.
I shuffled into the kitchen, opening the fridge, and there it was. Homemade food, all neatly packed. Mom, I mean Sunghoon's mom had been here. The sight of it tugged at something in my chest. I smiled, wincing as the cut on my lip pulled painfully. No one could cook like her. She always took care of me, even after everything.
I wondered what would be her reaction now if she knew about the future.
Can I keep pretending to be fine? Until that time comes again?
Opening the containers hurt like hell, every movement pulling at the bruises on my arms and chest. Even worse was trying to eat. My lips were cracked and bloodied, and each bite was agony.
Fuck.
It took nearly an hour to finish my meal. The pain made everything feel slower. After I was done, I picked up my phone and texted Sunghoon's mom, "Just had dinner. Tasted amazing as always. I wanted to visit today, but something came up. I'll come soon. Love you, Mom."
She replied within seconds: "Love you too, son," with a heart emoji.
I stared at the message for a long moment. The word son felt heavy.
Is this even possible? Keep lying? AM I ever going to escape this? Am I ever going to be able to ignore everything and everyone… and survive?
Before I let myself sink too deep, I texted Sunghoon: "Don't bother coming over in the morning. I need to see my uncle before class."
A lie. The last thing I wanted was for him to see me like this, looking like I'd been through a meat grinder. He'd never let me hear the end of it.
His reply was quick: "Sure. How's the girl, though? Did you get home?"
The girl. Choi Aera. I'd almost forgotten about her after getting beaten up. "She's fine. Lives nearby. Got her home safe."
"Good to know. Catch you tomorrow then."
I sighed. Sunghoon's house was just a five-minute walk from mine, but sometimes, it felt like we were worlds apart. He always carried things so effortlessly while I… I couldn't even make it through one night without my past closing in on me. I had to keep relying on some stupid meds every time I got an episode. There was no ending of it, not ever since that day I lost her.
I knew sleep wasn't happening tonight. Not after everything.
A few moments later my chest started tightening. That old, familiar weight pressing down again. I shouldn't even be here. The memories started creeping in—faster than I could push them back. The things I wanted to forget… things I'd buried so deep. Those memories wouldn't stop clawing at me, dragging me back to places I didn't want to go. Bloodied. Bruised. Broken. Nothing's changed, has it? Why was I even given a chance to come back here?
The panic was bubbling up fast. I couldn't breathe. I stumbled toward my bedroom, yanking open the drawer and tossing things aside.
Where is it? Where's the damn pill?
My hands shook as I grabbed the bottle, popping two pills. It wasn't enough. My breathing grew more erratic, and I found myself fumbling for the paper bag beside my bed. I pressed it against my mouth, breathing in and out, in and out, trying to calm the storm inside me.
But it didn't work. I couldn't stop those thoughts from coming in. I squeezed my eyes shut, but that only made it worse. Images of the dead flashed before me. My brother. My mother. My father. And her.
Her face haunted me most of all—the one who saved me that day.
My breath came in ragged gasps, and I threw the paper bag aside, collapsing onto my bed. My body trembled uncontrollably as I curled into myself, desperately trying to shut it all out.
How long can I keep running from this?
But there was no answer. Only silence. The pounding of my heart. And the suffocating weight of everything I couldn't escape.
. . .
There she appears again, smiling brightly as she offers me her hand. I take it without hesitation. We talk in silence until we reach a station. Everything is white. Too white to make the eyes go blind. She lets go of my hand, turning to me. "Is it hard, Bohyun?"
I open my mouth to talk but no words come out as if they are stuck in my throat. She chuckles softly, moving towards a bench. I follow her. "You are confused about everything right now," she begins. "Give yourself some time. Don't lose anything that you have around you. Don't blame yourself for anything. We don't have hands over everything. You cannot follow everyone who leaves. You are chosen to be here right now. You cannot undo things that have already happened, but you can rewind when you have the chance."
What does that suppose to mean? I look at her confused.
"You are given a chance, Bohyun. And I want you to make the best use of it without regretting it. Don't push yourself to the limit from where you cannot get yourself back. You have good people around you. Cherish them."
But why am I sent back here?
She reads my mind instantly then says, "To rewind things. Time is allowing you to rewind. And it's running fast. You will face too many things from now on. I want you to be strong."
Time? Do I have a time limitation?
"Yes. Only you have a time limitation."
Only me? Are there more people like me?
"You will figure it out in time. You need to protect them."
How much time do I have?
"Till the date you lived."
What if I cannot save all of them?
"You will be sent back in another time again without anyone remembering you as if you are forgotten from everyone's life."
What? Is this kind of a punishment?
She smiles, shaking her head, "I want you to think otherwise. I know you can do it. You can stop the casualties."
Casualties?
"Yes. You are here for a task. Find those you need to stop the end."
You mean the people who travelled back? What do you mean by 'stop the end?'
She ignored my thoughts and said, "You could have been sent back some more years ago but I wanted you to rewind everything from where you met your game changer."
Game changer?
"You already met that person."
Who is it?
She just smiles, not answering the question. She stands up as a train comes in.
"Protect your people." She says, turning back.
Wait! Wait! Ms. Jung! This is all too confusing!
I cannot speak! And she doesn't look back.