I leaned against the railing, the warmth of the afternoon sun hitting my face as I tried to process everything that had just happened. Vishal's presence, his words, the way he'd acted—it was all too much.
Sana, sensing that I needed a distraction, gently nudged me with her elbow. "So, about that guy from your main school... the one Aman was talking about."
I frowned. I wasn't sure if I was ready to talk about it, but something about Sana's tone made me want to share. Maybe it was the way she always knew how to pull me back from my spiraling thoughts.
"His name's Aryan," I said, the name falling from my lips like an old memory. I didn't think about him often, but when I did, it was like everything around me stopped. "He's... someone I thought I could trust. Someone I got close to. But that was before everything went south."
Sana raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. "What happened?"
I shrugged, feeling the familiar ache in my chest. "I don't know. We had our moments, but in the end, I think we were just two people who misunderstood each other. He... he was a part of my life back then, but I guess things just didn't work out the way I imagined."
Sana stayed silent for a moment, processing my words. I could see her trying to piece things together, trying to make sense of the pieces I had given her. "Sounds like there's more to this than you're letting on."
I let out a quiet sigh, running a hand through my hair. "I don't really like to talk about it. It feels like it's just a chapter that's already closed. But every now and then, I wonder if I made the right choice by letting him go. And then I remind myself why I did in the first place. It's... complicated."
Sana nodded, understanding the weight of my words. She knew I wasn't the type to dive into my past unless it was really necessary. And this was definitely one of those things I wasn't ready to revisit completely.
"Do you ever think about him now? I mean, now that you're seeing him again in school," Sana asked, her voice careful, like she didn't want to stir up too much.
I hesitated before answering. "I don't know. Sometimes, I wonder if I ever really got over him. Seeing him again after all this time—it's like a reminder of everything I tried to forget. But at the same time, I don't want to go back to what we were."
Sana let out a small laugh, trying to lighten the mood. "Sounds like you're still trying to figure it out. But maybe, just maybe, you're not ready for him to be a part of your life again."
I gave a half-smile. "Yeah, maybe."
She squeezed my hand, a soft comfort in the sea of thoughts swirling in my mind. "If he's still a part of your past, it's okay to keep him there. You don't have to open that door unless you want to."
I nodded, appreciating her words. Sometimes, I wasn't sure if I wanted that door open or if I had already sealed it shut.
Before I could say anything more, we both heard the sound of footsteps approaching from behind. I turned to see Vishal, standing a few feet away, watching us quietly.
Great, just what I needed.
"Riya," he said again, his voice low, like he was trying to catch my attention without startling me. "I didn't mean to cause more drama today."
I could feel my irritation building again, but I didn't want to lash out at him. Not now, not after everything that had just happened.
Sana looked at me, then back at Vishal, before giving me a knowing smile and slipping away. "I'll give you guys a moment."
And just like that, she was gone.
Vishal hesitated for a moment, then walked closer. "Look, I know I've been a jerk lately. But I didn't want to make things awkward between us. You've been distant, and I get that, but I just—"
I crossed my arms, my patience wearing thin. "What do you want, Vishal?"
He looked at me for a long second, like he was trying to decide if he should say more. "I just want to fix things. I don't want you to feel... like I'm part of the reason you're upset. It's not just about me or Aman—it's about us, and whatever's going on with you."
I let out a shaky breath, trying to keep my emotions in check. "I'm not upset with you, Vishal. I'm upset with the fact that I can't escape these feelings. I'm upset with how everything always feels like it's pulling me back into something I don't even know how to handle."
He was quiet for a moment. Then he said, "I get it. But just so you know, I wasn't trying to mess with your head."
I didn't respond immediately, my mind swirling. I wanted to say something, anything, but instead, I just nodded, letting the silence fill the space between us.
The rest of the day felt like a blur. Each class dragged on, but my mind kept replaying the moment with Vishal in the corridor. His words, his presence—it all kept swirling in my head, even though I was trying to push it all away.
I didn't want to think about him, not now. Not when everything was already so tangled up with memories of the past and the tension that had been building for so long. But, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't escape it. It was like his shadow followed me, even when he wasn't there.
By the time school ended, I was drained, both physically and emotionally. I didn't feel like going home just yet, so I decided to take a walk in the nearby park. The air was cool, and the calmness around me helped clear my mind—if only for a little while.
As I walked along the familiar path, I found myself thinking more about the conversation I'd had with Sana. Maybe she was right. Maybe I had been so focused on everyone else—the chaos with Vishal, the uncertainty with Aryan—that I hadn't stopped to think about myself. What did I truly want? What was I holding on to, and why?
But even with all those questions, one thing remained constant in my mind: I wasn't ready to face Vishal yet. I wasn't ready to have those conversations. There were still too many things unsaid, too many emotions left unprocessed.
I sighed, sitting down on one of the benches by the park's edge, staring at the distant horizon.
I wasn't sure how long I stayed there, but it felt like a long time before I heard footsteps approaching. I looked up, expecting to see someone familiar, but it was only Aman, walking with his usual cocky grin.
"Hey, Riya," he greeted, plopping down next to me without asking.
I raised an eyebrow, already knowing what this was about. "What do you want?"
He shrugged. "Just thought I'd check up on you after your little meltdown in class."
I rolled my eyes. "I didn't have a meltdown."
"You sure about that?" Aman said, leaning back against the bench. "You looked pretty close to flipping out."
I stayed quiet, not bothering to respond. The last thing I wanted was to get into another argument with him.
Aman wasn't one to leave things alone, though. "So, what's up with you and Vishal? You guys not talking anymore?"
I stiffened, my gaze moving to the ground. "It's none of your business."
Aman chuckled. "Just curious. You two have been… interesting ever since he came back. Thought maybe there was something going on."
I felt my chest tighten, but I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing how much his words were getting to me. "Don't talk about things you don't understand."
"I don't know, Riya. It's like you're pushing him away on purpose. You've been acting distant. Everyone's noticed."
My heart raced, but I kept my voice steady. "Maybe I just don't want to deal with it."
Aman's expression softened for a moment, but then his usual grin returned. "Well, if you change your mind about talking to someone, I'm here."
I didn't say anything. He got up after a while and left, leaving me alone again with my thoughts.
The rest of the evening passed in a haze, and by the time I got home, I was exhausted. I didn't feel like dealing with anything, least of all my own emotions. I wanted to shut it all out.
I tossed my bag onto my bed and collapsed into the chair by my desk, staring blankly at the wall. The only sound in the room was the soft hum of the fan above. My phone buzzed with notifications, but I ignored them, my mind too consumed with the events of the day.
I didn't know where things were headed with Vishal, or with Aryan for that matter. I didn't know what I wanted from either of them. But one thing was clear: I couldn't keep running away from it all forever. Eventually, I would have to face the storm I'd been avoiding.
But not today.