"The sound of my alarm clock!!!" ...
After opening my eyes to the symphony of the alarm clock, I found myself trapped in my bed, I could barely move, my body was writhing under the covers, and I had no memory of last night, but after some time, I was able to move my left hand to see what time it was "Oh shit, it's eleven in the morning, but what's this feeling? Why do I feel so bad?" I said.
I couldn't remember anything about what happened to me last night, but I felt vague. When I opened my window, the sunlight rushed into my room and shone brightly on my face
As I was trying to get out of bed, there was a knock on the door.
"Knock, knock."
"Aiken, still asleep?"
That voice, yes it's my mom, trying to wake me up thinking that I'm still drifting in my endless dreams, "Open the door".
"Son, good morning, get up and wash your face, breakfast is ready" she said.
When she said that, I turned my gaze towards her and she was holding my breakfast with a smile on her face, but why does it make me feel ashamed?
"Good morning, okay, I'm going to the bathroom," I said.
"Are you okay? Since yesterday you haven't been yourself," she asked.
Her face changed, and when I looked into her eyes, I could see the sadness and worry in them. I wanted to calm her down:
"I'm fine, mom," I said in a soft voice.
"Are you sure? Do you need something?" She keeps asking to make sure I'm comfortable.
"Don't worry, I'm fine, thank you for breakfast mom❤," I said as I gently touched her hand.
"You're the best, Aya-kun," she says, feeling my warm hand. "Well, don't let it get cold," she said as she slowly left the room, anxiety still wrapped around her heart.
I started to look at my smoky breakfast, two eggs grated on top of luncheon pieces, as I did almost every day, and then I started to contemplate my pathetic room; the orange color of the walls, the ceiling, the lamp partially infested with insect eggs, the college books that were randomly arranged on the table, everything repeated, even the annoying sound of the bed, which I eventually adapted to in the end.
"...CH! Stop thinking," I said sarcastically.
Suddenly some papers fell on the table, I took a deep breath and sighed. I got out of bed to pick up those papers, when I bent down to pick them up, I noticed that they belonged to an exam paper for a subject I teach at university (biochemistry), but as soon as I started looking at the question paper, I took two steps back; "I can't believe it...is it that bad...?" I said, realizing my predicament. I said, well aware of the predicament I was in. Finally remembering everything, that feeling, barely able to stop my right hand from shaking, I became aware of the gravity of the situation. Yesterday, it was a quarter past nine at night, and I was reading Yahari Ore no seishun Love Comedy, immersed in the action. Ten minutes later, I get a message from Suzuni-Kyouka, my classmate, who has long dark black hair and a beautiful brown left eye. Yes, I mention her left eye because her other eye was hidden by a bandage; unfortunately, she developed a tumor and had to have it removed. Whenever I received a letter from her, I remembered her tragedy. When I opened her message, I found a PDF file with the results of the 2022-2023 fall session written on it, I couldn't contain my nervousness, adrenaline accelerated my heartbeat, my feet felt like they wanted to escape from reality, it's the effect of adrenaline. Not only did my brain's computer release this hormone, it also provided a dose of cortisol that caused me to tense up, my feet moving involuntarily.
I closed my eyes and clicked on the file, then slowly began to open it. I glimpsed catastrophic points in the first lines, knowing that I was not one of those students, because the point system is based on the alphabet of the student's last name. Let's say, for example, in the case of Suzuni-Kyoka, her surname starts with the letter K, so she would be in the middle of the list. I started looking up my name:
"Ryoichi Ayajin," I said, my nerves getting the better of me.
But I noticed a name above my name, it's Suzuni, just like in every cycle of every university year, she got a V (for Validé in French) with a score of 10.07/20, something I expected. But what's different from last year is that she got a V (for Validé in French) with an average of 10.157/20, something unexpected for her, as she didn't show any intelligence in the previous exams. This fall session is considered one of the most difficult in the history of the college, especially in the second-year biology department, to get the average in this course means that you have passed the most difficult subjects such as chemical analysis techniques or Biophysics. Looking at her average score on each exam in the six subjects, there was one subject that caused her to cross the Non Valide edge, Statistics, where she scored 11/20. She had no idea about the mathematical relationships and issues related to this subject, the reason why she got this average, going back to the day of the exam in that subject, I was sitting in the second row, Suzuni was behind me, she had asked me some time before the papers were distributed to show her the answers to the exam, I had no reason to refuse, I accepted her request, but then I realized that I made a mistake by handing her the answers.
The truth is that I got the highest average in the college; 14/20, but that was not enough, I still didn't have enough points to make up for the loss in Biochemistry and Chemical analysis techniques. I finally looked at the dot next to my name, and it read as follows:
Ryuhichi Ayajin: (******* my card number): 9.9/20: NV
I felt like time stood still for a moment, "Are you kidding me, it can't be...?" I said with shock on my face.
It was unbelievable, especially since I had been studying hard day and night, "The exam must have been hard...yeah right, that's what I was meant to do." Or at least that's what I wanted to say to atone for my loss, a loss that made me cringe. What a pity, I was only 0.1 points away from winning, and it was then that Suzuni's words to me came to mind when we were on campus looking at the list where the fall semester exam date had been deposited. Suddenly Suzuni grabbed my hand with both of her soft hands, I bet she sensed my racing heartbeat through them, and approached me, "Aya-kun, we studied hard, we stayed up late together for this moment," she said in a soft voice filled with warmth.
"That moment?"
"Yes, the moment we excelled, you and I were on the same pace, we can outperform the other students, especially Jihan, but one of us can't top the other." She said.
"Why?" I asked.
"Because we're equals, whatever," she whispered, entering my personal space. Her words hit me hard like a wrestler punching me in the face, I felt a little dizzy, Kyouka put her face on my chest for a few seconds and without saying a word she walked away confused as if releasing a spell.
K-K-K-K... Kyouka? What's wrong?" I said, even in this cold I could feel the warmth of her body through her shirt, of course I was completely surprised, naturally I panicked, I couldn't understand what was going on.
"..."
Kyouka didn't answer right away, she answered after a while in a low voice.
"Sorry, F.... I just got a little lonely I guess. Anyway, I'm going to go meet my friend, see you tomorrow, Jin-kun," she stammered.
Kyouka ran away quickly before I could say anything, I couldn't see her face well but she might have been a little red, I stood next to the place we liked to go; (Jaber center) with my hand on my chest feeling the warmth that left it, I turned around and started my pathetic retreat. The thing that caught my attention was her talking about Jihan-chan, she is also my classmate from last year, I don't know much about her but I can say that she is a smart girl who is fluent in French even with her Bedouin accent and has a decent fan base. She also claims to have studied for 5 years at a computer institute where she got a master's degree, so she's considered an engineer, I'd say she has an IQ of around 110. We have a good relationship, though she may pose a threat to me, I don't know how quickly she will develop or adapt to events, so to speak.
Back in the present, my mind focused on one word, *equal*, a little surprising, but seriously listen to the question I'm about to ask and think carefully about the answer.
Question: Are people really equal or not?
All countries and society like to talk about these days is equality, demanding that men and women be treated equally, calling on society to get rid of inequality, demanding higher employment rates for women, personal use of cars for everyone, and even going so far as to advocate for equality for people with *disabilities*, until we no longer hear the term, and children are taught that all people are equal. That's how we were raised.
Is this true? I wonder.
Men and women will have different tasks as long as they have different abilities, and people with disabilities will still be disabled, no matter what term that person is called. None of this makes sense if no one cares about it.
In other words, the answer is no.
Humans are biased beings, there are no real *equal* people. They always have these platonic dreams, but sooner or later the world will collide with reality.
Everyone is equal, but at birth or death, do you think that one who struggled to study is the same as one who didn't put in the effort and just looked at you while you worked hard? And in the end, all the work you put in was summarized by a single glance at the question paper.
In other words, the word equality is full of lies and falsehoods.
"She didn't even ask me how I was doing, she must have seen my marks," I said. It's possible, because my name is under hers.
More importantly, I put myself in a position to jeopardize my survival in college because I repeated the first year twice, not that I'm an idiot who didn't know what they teach in college, but there were reasons why I repeated it. The point is, I don't have much time left. I looked at my breakfast and had no appetite for it, so I went to take a seven-minute shower and then went outside, cleaned myself up, put on a black hoodie and black pants and shoes, grabbed my breakfast box and put it in it, grabbed my bag and went out.
"I have to act fast."