Helix Academy, 12:50 AM
In the quiet of my dormitory room, I sat cross-legged atop my soft, white bed—the one that had cost me a fortune. Though far from wealthy, my mother had left enough behind to let me live without struggle. I still had no idea how I'd even been admitted into the Academy, but I had a strong suspicion that my irresponsible father was somehow behind the conspiracy.
Despite knowing that, I had joined anyway, because... well, I couldn't really remember the reason anymore. Maybe my mother had persuaded me—gently, of course. With flying shoes, terrifying glares, and other maternal warfare.
A white towel clung loosely around my shoulders, my damp hair still dripping from a recent shower. I hadn't bothered to dry off properly as I was too excited to care. Because in just a few minutes, I'd finally ascend to E Rank and shake off the humiliating title of proud owner of the first F-Grade Class.
The System Sister had already presented the choice, complete with its unneeded dialogue:
[The weak evolve. The strong ascend. Which one do you want to be?]
[Will you choose Transformation and Evolve?]OR[Will you choose Nirvana and Ascend?]
I stared at the glowing text, folding my arms as I sank lazily back into the pillowed headboard.
My understanding of Evolution hovered somewhere between zero and one. But the word Transformation at least rang a bell—I'd already gone through that during my Awakening. Every Awakener had to undergo it to awaken their Evolution Class.
It had only been three days since I received my Class, and the memory still lingered fresh and unwanted. I remembered my body being unmade—peeled apart like an overripe banana with too many seams, only to be stitched back together like a poorly patched pair of jeans.
And now the damned System wanted me to go through that again?
"Wait... System Sister said only the weak evolve," I muttered, narrowing my eyes. "Doesn't that mean Transformation is for weaklings?"
I had no desire to pick something designed for weaklings.
My gaze shifted to the second option.
If Transformation was for the weak, then Nirvana—reserved for the strong—had to be something far more terrifying, right?
Hmm... What the hell even is Nirvana? I screamed internally. My System was truly irresponsible. How could it not provide its host with basic explanations?
As if it had been eavesdropping on my complaints, a message appeared:
[Nirvana is Rebirth. And to be reborn, one must first die. Tell me, My Child — are you truly ready to experience Death?]
Death!
I stared at the word in silence.
Is it actually asking me to die... without even stating what the benefits are? I paused mid-thought.
Because even as the word Death! appeared, my mind didn't stop at Fear!—it skipped straight ahead to: What are the benefits?
My mind effortlessly focused more on benefits than the dying part.
And that wasn't normal.
That wasn't how people were supposed to react. I was beginning to understand now—losing the fear factor had been affecting my thought process far more deeply than I'd realized.
The way I'd glossed over Death! without a blink unsettled even me.
With caution, I reminded myself to always ask, What would a normal person do? before making any decision. Maybe that way, my decisions might be... less reckless?
With that thought, I returned to the choice before me.
The System had offered two doors: one led to pain, the other to death.
I tried to be rational. I weighed both options with care.
But how does one remain rational without fear?
Because without fear, there's no hesitation. And without hesitation, how can anyone tell the difference between caution and cold calculation? Between rewards and consequences?
Eventually, my mind settled on an answer. A cold, calculated one.
The only reason I'd even delayed this long was because I assumed most people would hesitate. But even that instinct was slipping away, crushed under the weight of logic. Logic that whispered Nirvana—despite its cost—might bring me more.
As for consequences?
...Were they really that scary?
Well, if they were, what did that feel like?
I shifted slightly, sinking deeper into the mattress as I composed myself. Then, before making the decision, I set aside the towel draped over my shoulders, reached beneath my pillow, and pulled out a white orb. For a moment, I simply gazed at the flickering hologram of my mother, letting the silence wrap around us both.
I raised my hand to wipe the tears... but stopped halfway.
There were none.
I coughed awkwardly.
Mom... your reckless son is about to die for a bit. Bless me, will you?
I watched her face one last time before storing it in the cupboard next to my bed as I didn't want to damage or taint it by whatever follows next.
Then, with the same detached calm that had taken root in me since my Awakening, I selected: [Nirvana]
The moment I did, a sharp chill surged through my core. My body temperature plummeted, and my heartbeat slowed dramatically, each thump growing more distant, more hollow.
Normal people get scared at this point... right? I wondered, oddly detached.
But the thought faded as I watched my skin lose all color, fading to a ghostly, vampiric pallor. My teeth were the first to go—cracking one by one, just as I instinctively lifted a trembling hand to my mouth. I barely had time to register the motion before the joints snapped—frozen solid from the inside.
Fortunately, the cold dulled everything. Otherwise, I knew I'd be howling from the sheer agony. Blood, bones, muscles, organs, nerves—everything inside me had turned to ice. Even blinking was no longer possible.
And still, I didn't resist nor did I lose composure. I wanted to yawn but quickly decided otherwise, losing teeth was enough.
Speaking of teeth... they will regrow, right?
I didn't want to appear like an 18-year-old grandpa!
Under my wide, unclosing eyes, a fine frost began to spill from my pores. The ice thickened rapidly, spreading over my limbs, chest, and face until it sealed me completely inside a growing cocoon. The crystal shell formed with eerie beauty—an egg of translucent ice that shimmered softly in the dorm room light.
Inside it, my heartbeat slowed... slowed...
Then stopped!
I died.
~~~~~
Beyond death, Lucian existed!
He had no form or shape to fill space. No movement to prove that time was even passing. But Lucian was there.
The only proof of his existence were his thoughts.
Where am I? It felt like his eyes were being forcibly shut, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't open them. He reached to pry them apart—then paused.
Wait... are my hands even moving?
Is this what death feels like?
His thoughts wandered aimlessly—either for a split-second or a lifetime—until finally, he heard something.
[You are here, My Child.]
There was no sound, not really. Maybe it was just a thought, too.
Who are you? he asked—at least, that's what he thought he did.
[I am everything you call Existence, and nothing you call Non-Existence. But in this instant of Eternity, I am simply 'Blank' in your Status Window.]
Lucian thought he frowned.
[I know you have questions, My Child. But now isn't the time for them.]
[Some unknown Entity has imposed a Karma upon you—one strong enough to bind even My Will. Soon, fate will start pulling events toward you, tying everything to that destined Karma. You'll become the center of every story. But remember this, Child: you are not the Protagonist. And these events are not your Plot.]
[I'll return a fragment of your stolen Fear Factor… and grant you a new Factor to rely on. Good luck, My Child.]
Before he could think of anything else, even his thoughts disappeared.
~~~~
Back in the dorm room, Lucian was still inside the frozen cocoon—stuck in the first phase of Nirvana: Death!
Then his body began to melt.
First, it softened into red paste… then turned into a thin crimson liquid that visibly lost color and density, like it was being dissolved by chemicals—going from solid, to liquid, to vapor. Before long, even the liquid was gone, leaving nothing behind in the ice cocoon.
And right then, the second phase began: Rebirth!
Inside the cocoon, glowing tendrils began to form, weaving themselves together slowly into the shape of a human body.
Bit by bit, piece by piece, Lucian reformed—curled up, arms around his knees, floating in silence.
Thump!
His first heartbeat slammed through the cocoon, rattling the inside.
Crack.
A thin fracture spread along the outer shell.
Thump.
Then came the second.
Thump.
Then the third.
Each one steady at equal intervals. Each one cracking the ice little by little.