Tobey: "The bath's ready."Father: "Reason?"
Narrator whisper:"Bro said it like he's the butler of a haunted mansion."
Tobey, serious: "Mom wasn't there. So I did it."Narrator: "We're witnessing the rise of a five-year-old homeowner."
Dad's daily IQ exam theory?That's not parenting.That's brain speed dating.
Tobey, nodding like a tiny professor:"Ah. Makes sense."Narrator:"And just like that, a five-year-old unlocked emotional maturity while still smelling like bubblegum shampoo."
Kitchen Scene: Tactical Cooking Edition
Rick, apron on, spatula raised like Excalibur:"These onions surrender in five minutes or less."Narrator:"History will remember this as the day vegetables got drafted into war."
Shalit walks in: "You're home."Narrator:"Translation: The stove's still standing. This is a miracle."
Rick's kitchen motto:"Cook like a chef. Flip like a ninja. Clean like it never happened."
Tobey: "Can I have a kitchen mission someday?"Narrator: "Yes. It's called 'wash the dishes.' Codename: SoapStrike."
777 post-shower with a towel like a war medal:"Trust me, kid—kitchen duty with your dad is how nations fall."Narrator:"And how pots disappear without a trace."
Soft Shalit Scene (with gentle, dry humor)
Father sees her sleeping, curls wild, sundress soft.Narrator (whispering):"She looks like she wrestled a nap and won by KO."
Scars visible. Tears dried.Narrator (gentle):"Some people carry history in books. Shalit carries hers under cotton sleeves."
Rick tucks a curl behind her ear.Curl: "No."It bounces back like it's got lore and attitude.
Rick, watching her breathe:"She's hiding the pain again."Narrator:"And yet she still wins every argument with a raised eyebrow."
He walks away muttering: "Dinner's on me again."Narrator:"The man can infiltrate enemy bases, but a nap takes down his wife and the entire house."