I thought that meeting her was one of the best things that had ever happened to me — yet here I am now, reminiscing about the past, sitting alone in this dark room, drowning in sorrow.
It happened under the most extraordinary of circumstances. I was 22 years old, just beginning my studies in a new country — a foreign world where people had different customs and a different culture. I felt out of place. That's when I met her.
Sometimes I can't help but marvel at how small the world truly is — she was from my hometown. Like two souls stranded in a strange land, we were drawn to each other and connected instantly. Don't get me wrong — she was also incredibly beautiful: jet-black hair, shiny and smooth as silk; rosy-toned skin; deep, dark eyes like the starry night sky; and a smile that could light up a room.
But my attraction to her went beyond the physical — it was spiritual. Little did I know at the time that it was only me who felt that way. Every emotion she showed turned out to be fake.
At first, I thought my attachment to her came from a sense of kinship, as we shared the same origin. I considered her a friend, but she was always bold with me — hugging my arm, kissing my cheek. Deep down, I knew I had feelings for her. Still, I kept wondering: how could a girl so radiant love someone like me?
Gradually, my heart grew warmer and began to crave her presence. I didn't just love the confident, fearless image she presented to the world — I also cared for her vulnerable, hidden self. But my self-doubt and inner hatred kept me from truly embracing my love for her. I always felt unworthy, like she was a bright star in the sky, and I was just a shadow — dull, broken, and insignificant.
And so, my greatest regret is that I never told her I loved her.
Eventually, she walked away — just like that. She forgot the hard times when I was the only one who stood by her. And when I needed her the most, she wasn't there. The final blow came when I saw her again, holding onto another man's arm.
I woke up and yawned. That dream — it had been so long since I'd had a nightmare like that. What brought her back to my mind? It's already been over two years since I last saw her.
Looking at my reflection in the mirror, I saw eyes — black and empty, reflecting no light. They say the eyes are the windows to the soul. If that's true, then I must be soulless now.
It felt like today would be a bad day.
I got back into bed and started scrolling through my phone. And there it was — that familiar profile. It seemed she had posted a story. Curiosity got the best of me. I told myself I didn't care — I was already over it all.
But then I saw her — sitting at a desk, eyes red and swollen, hair disheveled. The strong facade was gone. What I saw reminded me of the vulnerable girl I once knew.
And even though I told myself I didn't feel anything anymore, deep down, a part of my heart ached.
Then she spoke. Little did I know that the next words she uttered would change my life forever.