The summer was a bit hot, the kerosene lamp had already been extinguished. Tian Sangsang lay in bed, with a little bun beside her, though the bun took up very little space.
Tian Sangsang frowned, very worried, life was becoming unbearable.
There was no grain at home, the vegetable garden was barren, a grown-up with a little one, one chubby and one little bun, it was hard to get enough to eat. Thinking of what Aunt Zhong said, that her own sweet potatoes and peanuts could be harvested, gave her a glimmer of hope. At least there was something to eat, and it was protein-rich.
"Mom, can I sleep with you every day from now on?" In the dark, Meng Shuyan lay properly and asked with hopeful eyes.
"Of course!" Tian Sangsang, like a pregnant woman, turned over with difficulty and hugged him to her chest, "Mothers should always sleep with their children. And from now on, mommy wants our Yanyan to sleep on a big bed, a really big one, soft and springy so it won't break even if you bounce on it, and full of little bears and bunnies."
"I also want to let mommy live in a big house." Meng Shuyan nestled into Tian Sangsang's arms, his small head rubbing against her, a level of seriousness rare for a child his age on his face.
"Alright~" Tian Sangsang responded happily. The original owner really was blind, not wanting such a cute little boy, this is simply an angel. Her ex never even thought about having her live in a big house, only saying they had to pay the mortgage together. Men are useless, it's sons who are the most reliable.
In the distance, a few roosters crowed, crowing noisily, making it hard to sleep. The orange sunlight faintly projected on the wall, adding a touch of beauty to the simple room.
Tian Sangsang moved her eyebrows, opened her eyes to take a look, then closed them again, hugging her son tightly, intending to go back to sleep. After all, it's still early!
Hm? Where's the son!?
"Yanyan?" she called out hastily, turning her head, her eyes moving upward.
Meng Shuyan was sitting on the bed, lowering his head to remind her, "Mom, we should get up."
"Get up?" Tian Sangsang was stunned, oh my, her son with a pretty face was so cute. An early-rising son looks handsome no matter how you see it. Every time she saw the little bun, she couldn't help but think of a certain anime character she watched in her middle school years, small and with a little head, so incredibly cute. Always thought life was three-dimensional, never expected her son to let her experience a taste of living in a two-dimensional world.
"Great-grandmother said, you have to get up when you hear the rooster crow."
"It's still early~"
"But now it's the third time the rooster has crowed."
"Son." Tian Sangsang raised her hand and easily touched his curly hair, softly coaxing, "It's not even five yet, we can sleep a bit more. Getting up early is good, but you also need proper sleep to be full of energy for work. Come on, lay back down, mommy will wake you at six." She pressed Meng Shuyan back down.
As an office worker, with an eight-to-five schedule, she usually woke up a little past six, got ready, and then went to work.
She felt the little bun beside her being very quiet, even his breathing was light. In the thin morning light, she vaguely saw moisture in the little bun's eyes.
"Do you miss great-grandmother?" Tian Sangsang looked straight at him.
In a small voice, Meng Shuyan said, "When the rooster crowed before, great-grandmother would get up." He was used to it, hearing the rooster crow made him think of great-grandmother.
"Great-grandmother is gone, but you still have mommy." The topic of life and death was always too heavy, without personal experience one couldn't express the feelings. Tian Sangsang didn't want to discuss it too much, after all, Meng Shuyan was still too young.
Meng Shuyan's eyelashes fluttered, his dark eyes twinkling slightly, "Will mommy leave me like great-grandmother did?"
"No, mommy will always be by your side, in whatever form," Tian Sangsang reassured him, "Even if mommy is gone, mommy will become a star in the sky like great-grandmother, watching over you."
Meng Shuyan's little hand rested on Tian Sangsang's waist, hugging tightly, "But stars are so far away, I can't reach them. I want great-grandmother to be by my side."
Tian Sangsang gently patted his curls, "That's something we can't help. Yanyan, people must learn to look forward, great-grandmother will always live in your heart."
"So, mommy, please don't become a star, okay?" Meng Shuyan lifted his head slightly, pleading with a soft, sticky voice.
"Okay!" Tian Sangsang hugged him tightly in her arms.
The mother and son quietly enjoyed the moment.
After a while, Meng Shuyan suddenly said in Tian Sangsang's arms, "Mommy, you mustn't leave me in the future."
"Okay."
"Mommy, wherever you are in the future, I want to be there too, can I?"
"You can."
"Mommy, then today I want to go to the field with you too."
"Okay," Tian Sangsang reflexively agreed, suddenly pausing, "Eh?"
If it weren't for Meng Shuyan still being a three-and-a-half-year-old child, she would have felt an eerie sense that she might accidentally get entangled.
"No. Yanyan, the fields are too dangerous. You stay home; mommy will come back soon to make you something delicious." Tian Sangsang ruthlessly refused the little bun. Kidding, letting her son follow her into the fields, she couldn't bear it.
"Mommy is going to leave me?" Meng Shuyan's chubby hand hugged Tian Sangsang's waist even tighter, but unfortunately, no matter how strong the child's strength was, it couldn't be too strong, moreover, Tian Sangsang's waist was now full of rolls of fat.
However, the little guy's voice, gentle with a hint of fear, a touch of false maturity flowing with unintended sadness, broke Tian Sangsang's heartstrings.
"Alright, but Yanyan, you must be good, don't run around, sit by the side and watch. The fields are very dangerous."
"I'll listen to mommy," Meng Shuyan nodded his little head obediently. He had been to the fields with great-grandmother before, and it wasn't dangerous at all.
After lying down for a while longer, hearing faint voices outside, Tian Sangsang knew it was time to get up. Getting up was a struggle, as a chubby person, she had to use her hands and feet to crawl up, even the bed trembled a bit. She was already numb to it, underneath this chubby shell lived a thin soul. She could calmly tell herself, "It's okay, I'm different from those flashy whatsits out there."
But for Meng Shuyan, the little bun, got up easily, tilting his head upon hearing her, "Mommy, what are whatsits?"
"Whatsits are..." Tian Sangsang thought for a moment, "This word is very profound, it has different meanings under different contexts. And this word is something you understand through comprehension, when you feel it's not good to explicitly say something about certain people or things, you can use whatsits to express it."
"Oh," Meng Shuyan's big eyes twinkled, he smacked his little lips, "I think Teacher Zhou seems a bit like a whatsit."
Tian Sangsang squinted her eyes. Teacher Zhou was no longer a whatsit, saying whatsit would be a compliment to him, he was simply a scumbag.