Taeui went to the kitchen and stared at the cupboards and the fridge, feeling hungry but not sure what to eat. Finally, he decided to go for a sandwich and tea. When he sat down after preparing his meal, Ilay walked in freshly showered.
They stared at each other for a moment, but then Ilay glared and walked to the fridge without a word and drank water. There wasn't much Taeui could say, after all, they were in that situation because of him. Still, he didn't like it.
"Ilay, can w–"
"Taeui, how did you make Amber like you so much?"
He was still glaring as he asked the question in full seriousness. Taeui was taken aback and remained quiet, unsure what to say, until Ilay sat in front of him with a cup of tea.
"She kept telling me how much she liked to play with you and even asked if next time you could come with us…"
Taeui was speechless. Was Ilay… jealous?
"This doesn't sit well with me. Scarlet isn't showing a preference, and that's fine, but…"
Laughter bubbled up from Taeui's mouth before he could stop it. This man was truly unpredictable. Of everything he could be displeased with, he was worrying about this. Taeui stared at Ilay for a while, the knot in his heart unbounding slightly.
"She is a really cute kid, right?" Taeui said as if he was her uncle, too. "She just takes some time to get used to people. The first couple of days, she barely looked at me. You just have to be patient with her. She was scared of you just yesterday, you know."
"Yeah… that too. She said she wasn't scared anymore because you told her I would be nice to her. How can she believe people so easily?"
"So she shouldn't trust me?" Taeui said smiling.
Ilay looked at Taeui's finger, and Taeui noticed it. "She also told me you lost something important."
Taeui was startled and clenched his hand, hiding it below the table, his eyes looking down.
"I'm sorry."
"What are you apologising for?" Ilay clicked his tongue.
"... for everything. I keep messing up in a lot of ways."
The knot that seemed to ease a little talking with Ilay quickly returned to its size, and Taeui wasn't sure he could say much more without his voice breaking.
'This is all my fault. Why did I say I was his friend?'
Ilay waited for Taeui to look up at him, and when he didn't, after a moment of silence, he spoke. "Yes, you keep messing up."
Taeui remained silent, looking down unable to look him in the eyes. After a moment he got up and walked towards the door. "I'm sorry." He said not looking back.
"Taeui," Ilay called before he closed the door behind him. His eyes were cold and sharp. "You keep making the same mistake, but you don't even realise it. And when you do, there is not much I can do to help."
There wasn't a reply. Taeui just nodded and closed the door. Ilay clicked his tongue and finished his tea. Ilay was frustrated because both of them committed the same mistake over and over. Clicking his tongue again, Ilay got up and walked to Taeui's room.
"What are you doing here?" Taeui said, his eyes red.
Ilay walked towards the bed where Taeui was sitting up, lay down next to him and held him close. "I'll leave before they wake up."
This was what Taeui needed at the moment; Ilay knew that. Amid his depressing thoughts, Taeui needed an anchor. A safe point to reset.
Taeui didn't fight the warmth and quietly laid down facing Ilay. Their eyes met, and there weren't words that needed to be spoken. Taeui bit his lower lip and leaned closer to Ilay's chest, closing his eyes, barely stopping a sob from sounding. Ilay gave him a small kiss and pulled him closer. "There's no need to cry about this," he murmured.
Like Ilay had said, when he woke up, he was no longer lying by his side. Taeui was drained, and the thought of going out of his room and continuing to lie to Ilay's family made him even more tired. He felt nauseous, as if about to throw up. While dressing up after his shower, he was thinking whether to use his nausea to hide in his room when a soft knock sounded on his door.
"Yes?"
Amber walked in with Helena right behind her. He smiled, seeing the girl shyly saying 'Good morning.'
"Good morning. How is your knee?"
"All better," she said. Then she pulled her dress up to her knee and showed it proudly. "Uncle Ilay got these bunny patches for me, so it doesn't hurt one bit."
"Uncle Ilay is really nice, right?"
"Yes. And he is really good at games. Yesterday, he took us to a fair, and he won a whole bunch of plushies for us."
Taeui laughed and looked at Helena, who was watching him with a smile, "Yes. You seem to know Ilay very well indeed."
"We used to work together… that's why."
Helena didn't reply, instead, she looked around the room with a smile. For a moment, Taeui wondered if there was anything in his room that could be connected to Ilay in any way, seeing her observe the room with sniper eyes.
Ilay wasn't one to leave his things around; in fact, he was very organized, more so than Taeui, so it was more likely for Taeui to leave something in Ilay's room than the other way around. However, Taeui didn't go to Ilay's room that often since he only used his room for work.
"I'm glad Ilay has someone that knows him so well and believes in him."
Taeui smiled while scratching his head, feeling shy. On their way to the kitchen, Amber held Taeui's hand and told him all about their outing with Ilay. Amber saw Ilay leaving Kyle's office and ran up to him, hugging him with a 'Good morning.'
Ilay patted her head and gave her a small smile replying back. When he looked up at Taeui, his smile remained but he only gave a small nod. His eyes then met his sister and he smirked and walked away holding Amber's hand.
That afternoon, even though everyone was at home, the living room was strangely empty, so Taeui took the chance to read a book by the window. Outside, Amber and Scarlet were playing by the pool with Ilay and Kyle, and he got so distracted seeing them play that he forgot all about the book he had in his hand.
Ilay swam underwater, letting the girls run away from him, but catching Kyle right away and faking losing against the water guns the girls shot at him to save Kyle. However, at some point, Scarlet turned her gun to her sister and Kyle and helped Ilay instead. The picture seemed so surreal that Taeui even pinched his arm to make sure he wasn't delirious from the heat.
"Me and my husband were always worried about Ilay."
The voice brought him back to the living room, and he turned to it, surprised.
"We also worried about Kyle and Helena, of course. But Ilay always lacked empathy and had a very short fuse. Just like my husband's mother. And it got worse when she passed away."
"Was he difficult as a child?" Taeui asked reluctantly. He wanted to know more about his childhood.
Mrs Riegrow chuckled and sat on the chair opposite to Taeui, watching the scene outside for a moment before replying. "Well, not in ways that children usually give trouble. He never connected to other children, and he would rampage at anyone, whether child or adult, if he didn't like something."
"I was more worried about what would happen to the other person than at him. He was very little, around Amber's age, the first time he came home hurt. An older student bumped into him, and it escalated into a fight. He lost the fight, and he got home with bruises and cuts. But you know what he did when he got home?"
Taeui shook his head. He couldn't imagine Ilay so small hurt like that. For him, Ilay was invincible.
"He didn't cry or complain. Instead, he said he wanted to learn how to fight. When my husband and I didn't agree with it, he went to his Nana. She hired someone to train him. I saw him train day and night, and a few weeks later, we were called to the school because he beat up the kid who had hurt him."
Taeui nodded. That sounded just like him.
"If Ilay was already unapproachable with his bad attitude, with physical aptitude to back it up, after that, it just got worse. Even his cousins didn't get close. And I always worried he would miss out the joy of truly connecting to someone and be alone until the end."
Mrs Riegrow looked at Taeui and smiled fondly. Taeui smiled back but didn't say anything. They continued staring at them playing outside. After some time, she stood up and walked away.
"I'm grateful Ilay has someone he can call a friend and that he can connect to his nieces properly." Mrs Riegrow said with a big smile before leaving the room. Ilay had his mother's smile.
Taeui couldn't smile back. He pulled his knees up and hugged them while leaning his head on them.