'What if she goes further?' His head rang while he removed his white shoes at the entrance of their house.
He had returned home late, with a mug of beer in his stomach, getting amazed yet again, for the whole house was still alive as the day, the chatter of his video on YouTube rolling so loud that he could hear it from the entrance.
He didn't drink much, yet reeked of booze, squinting his nose as he pressed it against the shoulder of his orange sweater, taking a step towards the noise coming from the living room.
'She's still awake?' He asked himself, his eyebrows creasing, and stopped at the foot of the living room.
She was sitting at the dinner table, her phone against the basket of oranges.
At the sound of his footsteps stopping, she gazed at him, her hands on the table, her tone numb, her eyes copying it. "You're late."
His eyes jittered, for he knew she did not like him coming home late.
He bit his lips, placed his tote bag on the table, yanked the chair before her, and sat on it, forgetting he had been thirsty a minute before. 'Is she angry?'
He hadn't become accustomed to her altered personality. There was a fear in his heart that she would change into her old being any second.
"I'm-I'm sorry. I just ...lost track of time." He gazed hesitantly into her tranquil eyes, his skin tingling.
"Did you drink?" She asked, standing up, and rounded to the kitchen counter. She was worried for him. She had been blaming herself for hurting him, and witnessing him coming home late evoked a sense of fear of losing him in her heart.
Unsettled, he watched her pour water into a glass; he did not know what was inside her mind.
"Y-yes. Just a glass." He answered, taking the glass of water she placed on the table, and sat back on her chair.
"Hm." She shifted her eyes to the oranges and stared at them with a hint of pain.
"Did you have fun with your friends?" She questioned further, her tone lazy, and looked at him.
"It was..okay." He placed the empty glass on the table, the heaviness of the moment intensifying his heart.
There was something about that moment. Neither he nor she could read each other's minds, which they wanted so badly.
"Why did you ...not sleep?" He questioned. It had been a long time since she had waited for him to return home from his late meetings. He wanted to know why she was acting the way she was, but could not ask her directly.
"I wanted to see you. It's been a whole day you've been.... gone." She answered in a hushed tone, staring at his eyes, which were taking on a color of astonishment.
His heart chiseled. 'How could she say something like that with no expression?'
"How was your day?" She asked, fisting her hands tight together. She had been dying to see him all day, but could not do anything.
"I-it was good." He stuttered, clutching his thighs, his chest heaving, and his eyes wandering on the floor.
"Hmm." She nodded, adding, "Well, you should ... go and clean up. It's late." She wanted to ask if he was happy, but could not, and he wanted to ask if she was fine.
He remained still for a few seconds, his eyes staring at her dazedly, then nodded lazily and stood up when she abruptly said, "And don't ...stay out so late. I get ... worried."
He froze for another second, his cheeks burning, his skin crawling, then dashed to the washroom once she stood up, her eyes fluttering at the ground.
They could not look at each other.
'Has she really gone crazy?' He hurriedly removed his clothes and shoved them into the basket of clothes.
'She must have.' He turned the knob, running the water in the bathtub, and sat naked at the edge of the bathtub, his eyes lost into the bathtub.
'Why is she acting like that?' He stepped into the bathtub, water overflowing from the edges, when suddenly the door unbolted.
He turned around, wide-eyed, and quickly sat into the bathtub, hiding his body with his incapable hands.
She stood with fresh and folded clothes in her hands, and instantly looked away at the sight of his naked body. 'As if they had never seen each other naked.'
"I'm --- I'm sorry. I brought you fresh clothes." She took two steps in, and without looking at him, placed his clothes in the bucket, turned around, her breath stuck in her throat, and stepped out, closing the door shut, falling against it.
He remained astounded, his body numb, and shrank inside the bathtub, just staring at the door as if he had seen a ghost.
"What the fuck?" They both muttered, breathlessly, their lungs heaving.
Since she had decided to follow her heart, everything had changed. She was kinder and sweeter to him.
She had also been more sexually active, kissing and hugging him. 'Is this what being sexually active means to him?'
He was happy with that much affection, obviously, hungry for more, but not initiative.
He considered her speed. He didn't want to do anything she didn't like, so he hid his desires.
Curled on the floor, she rubbed her face with her palms, inhaling strongly, then stared at her bed, exhaling.
'I want to do it.' She thought, 'But should I? .. Would it be too much for him?' She went on, thinking, 'I promised myself I'll do whatever comes to my mind.'
'But it doesn't mean everything that comes into my mind is right.' She shut her eyes tightly and inhaled.
'No!' She stood tall, her hands fisted. 'I'll do it!'
After a few minutes, she knocked on the bathroom door, her free hand curled behind her back, her heart booming, her skin sweating, and her body swelling with the thoughts in her head.
He had slithered into the bathtub, rinsing himself in the warm water, his hair wet, his skin warm, and his mind numbed.
"Yes!" His ears stood at the sound of the knock on the door, and he stared at it, curling himself.
"Can I come inside?" Her tone was subtle and natural, not telling the rush in her veins.
His heart boomed, and he kept quiet for a few seconds, unable to believe his ears. 'She wants to come inside?... Why?'
She knocked again when no answer came and asked, "Are you fine, inside?"
"Yeah!" He boomed, astounded, "Yes!... I'm fine." The ground beneath his feet had been shaken.
"Then, can I come inside?" She questioned, her feet trembling.
He inhaled, shutting his eyes and answered. "Y-yes!"
Slowly, the door creaked and she stepped inside, her eyes staring into his eyes. "Is.. Is something wrong?"
He instantly questioned.
END OF THE CHAPTER
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