"Azumaaaaaaaa! Azuma! Azuma! Let's go raid another dungeon!" Aphrodite cheered, repeatedly poking her finger into the side of Azuma's cheek.
"Fuck no," Azuma replied eloquently.
"Whyyyyyy not! It'll be funnnnn!" Aphrodite whined, poking her finger into his cheek again.
"Because I barely got shit last time," Azuma deadpanned, not moving from his spot lying on his bed.
"What do you mean?! You got a ton of good stuff! All those points! And the level up!" Aphrodite shouted, now grabbing the side of his cheek as she pulled it outward.
"That shit doesn't seem all that good anymore," Azuma deadpanned, gesturing around them, "I got like, what, 10,000 points? Do I look like I need that shit right now? Do I look fuckin' poor?"
"...yes," Aphrodite deadpanned, staring down at Azuma, who was still lying on a bed in the middle of the cave that was his dungeon.
"Well, yeah, I do," Azuma agreed, "But not because I'm actually broke!"
The resort's opening had been massive, drawing in thousands of guests instantly - which had been expected, as the relatively small town of Kuoh had never seen anything so grand. The first day had been the biggest - bringing in roughly 10,000 guests.
For a city of Kuoh's size, which couldn't be compared to the major cities in Japan, the turnout was amazing, especially considering that Azuma hadn't done much advertising.
Not that he needed to advertise - it was hard to miss a literal skyscraper being built in the middle of the city, especially when said skyscraper was entirely constructed over the course of a couple of weeks.
Most of the guests were humans, meaning that Azuma didn't get more than a point or two for them, but there were also a surprising amount of supernatural guests.
I guess posting on the devil net paid off!
Little did Azuma know, Ravel had spent an insane amount of money buying fake engagements and forced advertising from Deviltter, DevTok, and Devilbook - resulting in the resort gaining a ton of supernatural attention.
It was especially impressive considering she made the resort go viral while also somehow keeping her parents from seeing anything about it.
And so, for the few days that the resort had been open, Azuma had been rolling in riches.
Man, it feels good to be fuckin' rich.
Azuma idly glanced at his stat page.
[Azuma Kaito]
[Dungeon Master]
Dungeon Rank: F (40,520 D-Value)
Level: 8 (5,275/5,000)
HP: 7,125/7,125
MP: 14,500/14.500
STR: 157
AGI: 142
END: 103
INT: 152
CHA: 5
LUK: 3,570
HPREG: 80
MPREG: 80
Abilities: [Time Dilation], [Health Container]
Dungeon Level: 2
Dungeon Boosts: None
Points: 75,200
The points from his human and supernatural guests, along with the near-constant multiplier from his high LUK stat, meant that he was bringing in anywhere from ten to twenty thousand points every day.
And this is just the start. It'll only keep growing.
As he continued to expand the resort - or, more specifically, as Ravel paid workers to expand the resort, more guests would come flooding in.
I'm gonna single-handedly make Kuoh a tourist destination.
"Alright! You're right, Aph, I do look broke! Let's spend some of this shit!" Azuma grinned pushing himself out of his bed.
"...I must insist that you train today, Master," A tired, near-defeated, voice spoke from the side of the room, "You have command seals, so you will be the target-"
"Didn't ask, brit." Azuma shot her down instantly, ignoring her warning completely.
Standing near the TV, trying her best to ignore the constant goblins walking past her, was Artoria Pendragon - the literal spirit of King Arthur reborn in the form of a beautiful blonde elfish woman.
She was clad in her typical armored skirt which covered most of her body, but notably not all of it. Her large breasts pressed outward from the top, and even the wide skirt couldn't entirely hide the wagon on her rear.
Is she hotter than I remember?
The woman was notably much thicker - in all right places - than Azuma's memory of Saber was. But, he just shrugged, deciding not to question it.
In regards to a sword trainer, there was possibly no one else in history that would've made for a better trainer. Unfortunately…
Why'd I have to get a British one?
Azuma was a wannabe American.
He was actually Japanese, but in his past life he was one of those 'way too obsessed with American culture to the point that it's kind of weird' type of people.
And so, the woman had been trying desperately to teach him how to use a sword for the past week, and Azuma had been blatantly refusing her.
"Let's see…" Azuma hummed, looking through his pages of units as he decided to spend some money.
"I still think we should go raid a dungeon…" Aphrodite whined, "What about your dungeon level?! Or your abilities! You can get more!"
"Can I?" Azuma replied dryly, calling out into the tunnel leading toward the Dungeon Realm, "Yo, Mittelt?"
"Yes, Master?" Mittelt peeked her head through the curtain at him curiously.
"What abilities did that orc dungeon master have?" He asked dryly, and Mittelt just blinked at him confusedly.
"Abilities?" She asked, not understanding the question.
"Yeah, that's what I thought," Azuma nodded, turning back to Aphrodite, "I didn't get shit from him, because he didn't have fucking anything! He had no abilities! Zero! Because his fucking god gave up on him before he got that far!"
"...oh," Aphrodite blinked.
"Yeah, it wasn't that surprising though. He gave up on that moron before he even got a fucking name," Azuma sighed, turning back to his unit page, "Here, Aph. I won't go raid a dungeon, but I'll summon a couple of gobby's for you."
Azuma tapped the option, and a collection of goblin miners appeared around them.
"Go find Gobby and do whatever he says," Azuma waved lazily at the tunnel, and the goblins saluted before they headed into the tunnel.
"...they're so cool," Aphrodite breathed out, watching the goblins walk away.
"There's not a single thing cool about goblins," Azuma deadpanned, turning back to the units.
I've been meaning to expand the dungeon a bunch - I'm too rich to keep living in this shitty little cave.
Azuma pulled up the worker options, tapping on the most expensive one - the Giant Mole.
In an instant, a giant mole appeared in front of him. Unfortunately, he was really giant.
"A-Azuma! He's suffocating!" Aphrodite cried out, poking at his cheek again as the mole appeared with his head literally in the ceiling. It was as if his head as phased through the rocks.
"Do something! You gotta save him!" Aphrodite pointed at the mole dramatically, "Hang in there, Moley! We'll help y-"
"He's a fucking mole," Azuma deadpanned, cutting Aphrodite off. At his words, the mole reached up his claw and easily carved through the rocks surrounding him.
"...oh," Aphrodite nodded sagely.
"Alright, mole, I've been living here long enough. I want an actual bedroom - get to work!" Azuma pointed dramatically at the wall behind him. The mole saluted, stepping forward and slamming his claws into the wall.
The effect was instantaneous, as his hands clawed through the rock with ease, and… caused the roof the shake, a pile of rocks falling onto Azuma's bed as the stability of the cave was affected.
"...shit, I didn't think of that," Azuma sighed, staring at the pile of rocks that were crushed what was once his bed, "Ravel!"
"Yes, Master?" Ravel appeared in an instant, coming out of the mining tunnel that she had been ordering the goblins around in.
"I want this place to look cool as shit!" Azuma declared, pointing at her dramatically, "Do everything for me! Make me a bedroom, a movie theater, a… pool! And whatever the fuck else I'd want!"
"On it, Master!" Ravel answered instantly, nodding at his words.
"Good. While you do that, I'm going to go back to slee-" Azuma blinked, taking in the destroyed bed in front of him.
"Well, shit."
"...Since your bed is destroyed, instead of going to sleep you could train!" Artoria suggested, her face brightening a bit.
"...fuck no," Azuma replied bluntly, prompting turning away from her, "I'd rather hang out with some fuckin' gobbys. In fact, I will go hang out with them. Gotta try to figure out how to get CHA somehow."
Azuma promptly walked through the hanging curtain into the mining tunnel, leaving a deflated Artoria behind him.
"Why did I have to be summoned to such a master? And with a weak body too…" She sighed.
The heroic spirit had been summoned in the form of an elf unit - meaning her body was far from its usual strength and would need to be upgraded just like any other unit. Though, Azuma was actually happy about that - as having to use his 'precious mana' to maintain a 'damn brit' would've been annoying.
Azuma whistled as he entered the tunnel, glancing around at how much it had been improved. The tunnel stretched hundreds of feet forward, extending far enough that Azuma couldn't see the end even with the glowy orbs lighting it up from above. To the sides, openings formed in the walls.
As he walked down the tunnel, he glanced into the small rooms littering the side of the tunnel, nodding appreciatively at the Talac berries that were set up within them. He'd sent out many more much stronger scouting parties after the resort's opening, but they hadn't returned yet, so he only had the Tallac berries to grow at the moment.
That wasn't a problem yet - the berries had been a big hit amongst the resort guests. When the dryads, who had gotten training from Phenex Clan chefs, prepared the berry and implemented it into different meals it was even better than Taga's poor attempt to prepare it.
As he walked further down, he was pleasantly surprised to see the tunnel extend outward, allowing for more goblins - who were still the majority of the miners, though there were more expensive units now - to work at the same time.
Azuma continued down the tunnel, walking… and walking… and walking…
I know they've been at it for a few weeks now, but damn! How fuckin' deep does this go?
Azuma tensed his legs, debating on if he should just run the rest of the way. Then, he relaxed.
Nah, this is kind of nice anyway. A nice relaxing walk. No historical legend trying to get me to train, no ugly goblins blocking my view, and, most importantly, no annoying Aphrodi-
"Azumaaaa!" A voice called out behind him, the tiny goddess calling out to him in greeting as she decided to follow him.
Never mind. I'm outta here.
His legs tensed, and he instantly appeared further down the tunnel as he skipped through time.
"W-Wait, Azuma! I'm coming t-" Azuma luckily reached far enough down the tunnel that he couldn't hear Aphrodite anymore, and soon after stumbled upon the end of it.
For over a hundred a feet across, piles upon piles of monsters pushed into each other, swinging their pickaxes as they mined into the wall.
"Grah! Gblalah!" Azuma glanced over, blinking as he spotted Gobby. His first unit looked a bit… different.
He's definitely letting the power get to his head.
Instead of his usual near-naked clothing, with just a loin cloth, Gobby was fully clothed. However, he wasn't just fully clothed, he was wearing…
Is that a rolex? Versace? He has Jordan's on in the mining tunnel?
True to Azuma's thoughts, Gobby was decked head to toe in expensive clothing. He had on a silky yellow shirt with a black design on it, a long pair of white sweatpants, and Jordan sneakers on his feet. He also had a shiny gold watch on his wrist, along with a gold chain hanging around his neck.
He's exploiting the other monsters, making them do his work while ordering them around, and is spending his non-existent salary on designer clothes?
Azuma stared at him blankly, opening his mouth, "..."
"...I've never been more proud," Azuma nodded proudly, causing Gobby to realize he was there and quickly go into a saluting pose, "Good work, Gobby. Good work."
[Compliment] training started!
[1/10] Until Milestone!
Azuma blinked, staring blankly at the notification.
"The fuck?" He muttered, unintentionally causing Gobby to deflate as the goblin couldn't see the window, instead thinking that Azuma just stared at him and said that randomly.
"Azuma! Why didn't you wait for me!" Aphrodite whined, finally floating up behind him.
"Oh, you were coming?" Azuma lied easily.
"Yes! I was yelling behind you!" She whined, and Azuma didn't look in her direction.
"Oh, didn't hear you," He lied again, then pointed at the notification as he glanced at her, "More importantly, what's this? 'Compliment training?'"
"Oh! That must be for your CHA!" Aphrodite deduced, nodding sagely.
"I know that," Azuma deadpanned, "But why am I just getting it now? I give compliments all the time!"
"Hmm…" Aphrodite hummed, her face squishing as she thought hard, "...Maybe it had to be toward one of your units?"
Azuma blinked.
That… might make sense.
"Oh. Ravel doesn't count since she's my attendant, and I'm usually a total dickhead tyrant to all the other units," Azuma deadpanned, staring down at dripped-out Gobby.
"Yeah, but… that can't be it! You've given me tons of compliments!" Aphrodite shook her head.
"I probably have to be genuine for it to count," Azuma hummed, thinking more about the sudden training progress, "I can't be sarcastic, or be giving a fake compliment to manipulate someone."
"Oh, that could be it!" Aphrodite nodded along with him, then suddenly froze, "...wait, that means all those times you complimented me…"
"No, I totally meant it all those times," Azuma replied dryly, "I wasn't just saying that so you would stop talking, or so that I could use those giant melons on your chest as pillows in the future. It just didn't activate because you're a special unit, remember?"
"Hmm…" Aphrodite thought for a moment, looking at him strangely, "...are you sure?"
"Of course I am," Azuma nodded, "You're my best unit! Like, no one else has tits that big, y'know? Here, I'll upgrade you to show you I'm serious. You said I could once the dungeon leveled up, right?"
"Oh, yes! You can," Aphrodite nodded, perking up at the prospect of being upgraded, "Just do it like you would any other units!"
Azuma nodded, looking at her seriously.
[Aphrodite] - LVL 7
[Upgrade with Points]
[Evolution Tree] - First Level Unlocked!
[EXP: 750/2,500]
Azuma tapped on the evolution tree, watching as another screen appeared.
[Aphrodite]
[Evolve]
Level 1 Evolution:
Cost: 25,000 Points
Evolve from [Miniature Goddess of Love] to [Tiny Goddess of Love]
1.2x to all of [Aphrodite]'s stats
[Special] Full Power Limit increased by 5%
Azuma balked at the number, "Damn, you're fuckin' expensive."
Am I really going to spend 25,000 points on this airhead?
"Of course I am! I'm the Goddess of Love!" Aphrodite puffed her chest out proudly, wrapping her arms under them and unintentionally causing the orbs of meat to wobble.
Azuma stared at her - or, more specifically, at the giant mounds on her chest.
…Yes, yes I will. Fuck it.
Azuma tapped the evolve option, and suddenly a bright white light enveloped Aphrodite.
Her already porcelain skin glowed a bright white, and then expanded. The light grew brighter, consuming her entire body and lighting up the entire tunnel around them. The light extended outward, and Aphrodite's body became nothing but a shadow.
Then, just as quick as it appeared, the light vanished. Where Aphrodite had been standing before was now… Aphrodite, but much bigger.
"Damn, I should've done that sooner," Azuma hummed appreciatively, looking at Aphrodite's new, larger, body.
While she had previously been roughly the size of his hand, now her breasts alone were big enough to fill his entire hand. Not that that was saying much - the woman's body was practically half boobs already. Overall, she was a bit over a foot tall now, seeming more like a decently sized doll than a large figurine.
"Not big enough to be pillows, but we're getting there," Azuma mused sagely, staring blatantly at Aphrodite's breasts.
"Thanks, Azuma! I feel so much stronger already!" Aphrodite cheered, pumping her fist upward, "Now we have to go on another dungeon raid! I can use so much more of my power - I bet I could beat the boss all on my own!"
"Yup. For sure. Whatever you say," Azuma answered robotically, still blatantly staring at her huge breasts.
"A-Azuma… d-don't stare so much," Aphrodite blushed, crossing her arms over her breasts as she noticed his gaze, "I-It's so lewd…"
"You're the Goddess of Love," Azuma deadpanned, feeling like he had already had this conversation with her multiple times before.
"I-I'm still a vir-"
"Still a virgin, yeah, yeah, whatever," Azuma waved her off dismissively, "But, this upgrade was good enough. You can stay as my sleeping buddy."
"S-Stay?" Aphrodite frowned at him as she whined, "Were you thinking of kicking me out?! You can't kick me out!"
"Well… Ravel still sleeps at the Phenex Estate, but Ivy's here now," Azuma trailed off.
"S-So?! I was there first!" Aphrodite huffed, glaring lightly at Azuma, "You can't kick me out for her!"
"I don't know…" Azuma trailed off, being fake indecisively, "I can't fuck you until you're back in your normal form, but Ivy…"
"T-That's what this is about?! I-I can't do that, but…" Aphrodite flushed, glancing away as she pressed up her breasts again, "...I can do other things…"
"I'm messing with you," Azuma finally let up on the teasing, poking her breast lightly with her finger and pushing her back in the air, "I'm not replacing you. If anything, Ivy would just join us, not replace you."
"T-Thanks…" Aphrodite nodded, but still wouldn't meet his eyes, "B-But… if this is what I need to do to stay in the bed… look!"
Azuma blinked, watching as Aphrodite abruptly pulled the sides of her toga apart, flashing him with her massive breasts.
….I take back every bad thing I've ever said about her.
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Taga! You got some new items for me?" Azuma called out to the little rat-man, waving at him lazily in the main room of the dungeon.
The main room itself looked much different, as Ravel had gone overboard on making it look nice. Instead of looking like the inside of a cave, it now actually had smoothed-out walls and genuine lighting from the human world instead of glowy ores.
The walls were also a shiny white, along with a tiled floor replacing the stone one. There was a much nicer couch, along with an even bigger TV, a genuine kitchen, and a carpet on the floor.
Overall, the once cave-like room now looked like a room you'd find in an expensive house.
"Aye," Taga nodded, turning around at his words, "After my donation last time, they increased the tier of my items. There's two in particular I think you'll be excited about."
Taga still got products from the 'Rat God' through the dungeon system from time to time to sell. While he was now a part of Azuma's dungeon, he had joined in name only. Azuma hadn't officially made him one of his units so that the rat could continue to get his goods, and then give said goods to Azuma for free.
Azuma had already gotten a set of wares from Taga before, but in doing so Taga had explained that he could offer 'donations' to his higher-ups in the dungeon to raise his own status and gain better items. The system was in place to reward rats who were good at their job and wracked up a lot of points.
Honestly, for being stuck in just the Dungeon Realm, this rat Dungeon Master's got a good plan laid out.
The rat dungeon was essentially exploiting the work of other dungeons, giving them rare items in return for heaps of points.
Luckily, I have a resort, so I don't need to try and set up a system like that.
Since Azuma had been literally rolling in cash from the resort as of late, he had given Taga fifty-thousand points - the requirement the rat said he needed to reach the status that would upgrade the overall tier of all his products.
Even if I'm rich now, it was still a big fuckin' blow.
Fifty-thousand still wasn't pocket change, even if Azuma was making thousands every day from the resort.
"Here they are," Taga grunted, tapping his finger in the air for a moment as he accessed his own system as a rat unit, and then suddenly a towel with a row of items appeared on the ground.
Azuma crouched down, inspecting the new items.
On the far left sat a pile of small compasses - one being blue, one red, and one green.
[Rare] [Dungeon Compass] - Always points back to your dungeon.
[Rare] [Conqueror's Compass] - Always points to the nearest non-owned or allied dungeon.
[Rare] [Explorer's Compass] - Always points to the nearest Floor Entrance.
"I guess I won't ever be getting lost, but I already have a mini-map," Azuma muttered, being unimpressed by the trio of rare compasses.
"If you want to go to deeper floors, these are necessary," Taga explained, nodding at them, "Your map won't update until you or a unit has explored it, and Floor Entrance's are often hidden. Unless you want to sacrifice units to expand the map, you'll risk running into a dungeon unknowingly."
"Fair enough," Azuma conceded, glancing at the next pile of items. There were a pile of colorful and transparent crystals lying next to each other.
[Rare] [STR Crystal] - Increases your STR by 1%
[Rare] [END Crystal] - Increases your END by 1%
[Rare] [AGI Crystal] - Increases your AGI by 1%
[Rare] [LUK Crystal] - Increases your LUK by 1%
The list continued, there being a crystal for each stat.
These are pretty good. 1% isn't much right now, but the longer I save them the more useful it'll be.
As his stats increased, that 1% would become larger and larger as a base number.
Azuma turned away from the crystals, looking at the next item - which was not in a group this time. A gold chain was laid on the towel. In the middle of the chain sat a small circular holder with a large red gem in the middle.
[Rare] [Amulet of CHA] - Increases your CHA by 10%
"Just a straight ten percent?" Azuma muttered, nodding approvingly, "How the fuck is this the same rarity as those gems? It's just ten times better."
"You have to wear it to get the buff. You can stack the gems by consuming them, but the amulets will feel heavy on your neck if you stack too many," Taga explained.
It's still fuckin' stupid. I'll have fifty amulets hanging on my neck lookin' fly as hell if it means I'll get more buffs.
"The next two aren't too good," Taga grunted, gesturing to the next two items, which were two glittering balls of ore covered in bits of rock and dirt, "They're common ores from the deeper floors, but not anythin' that crazy. The rats on the higher floors can sell 'em for triple the price you can sell 'em to the system since there's no way to get them up here. It's not enough to make anythin' good either - I could make a dagger or knife at most."
Azuma glanced at the two balls, one being a bright pink and the other a dark yellow.
[Petalite Ore]
[Pyronium Ore]
"Just keep them for now. If you get sent more, then we can add them together and make something worth it," Azuma hummed, waving off the two ores. He turned to the next item, which was a rainbow-colored crystal that seemed to glint in the light of the glowy ore.
[EPIC] [Progression Crystal] - Increases your progression progress gains by 1%
Azuma blinked, staring at the crystal.
"That's fuckin' good," He hummed, a small grin forming on his face.
While 1% wasn't that big of a boost, it added up when you needed literal millions of progress for higher milestones.
Would've been nice to have during the LUK training. I'd have finished a lot sooner.
"That was the epic rarity item, but the next one…" Taga trailed off, gesturing to the final item, "Since I donated so much at once, they gave be a legendary one this time."
Azuma's eyes widened slightly. Usually, Taga got anywhere from 5-10 items, with all of them being the same rarity except one. Previously, he would've had all [Common] items along with one [Rare]. Now, since he had raised his status, he would be given all [Rare] items and one [Epic] item.
Taga being given a [Legendary] one was a big deal - a huge deal indeed. To get to the status where he'd be able to get a legendary one, Taga said he'd need to donate a million points. But, the rat dungeon seemed to think that Taga was their next goldmine since he donated all his points at once, and were trying to give him a little boost.
Azuma turned to the last item, his eyes wide.
"Is that… a fucking bird?" Azuma deadpanned, staring at the literal living bird that was curled up on the towel sleeping.
"Not just any bird," Taga countered, a large grin forming on the rat's face, "Check it out."
Azuma looked at it closer, his eyes widening in shock as the description appeared.
[Legendary] [Phoenix] - A familiar in the form of a Phoenix.
"A fucking Phoenix?" Azuma spit out, staring in shock at the bird, "They just gave us a fucking Phoenix?"
A literal mythical phoenix is only legendary? Maybe I should actually learn from that trainer girl, even if she is British…
If a Phoenix was [Legendary], then how strong is his [Heroic] trainer?
Very fuckin' strong. I'm not completely dumb - I know she's Saber. She's a heroic spirit, even if she is a British one.
"A tamed one too," Taga replied smugly, "These things can't be found anywhere but the deepest floors. Even there it's hard to find one, and even harder to tame it. You'd have to defeat it in its fully-powered form - and, considerin' it can regenerate forever, that's a darn big task!"
Yeah, no shit. I don't wanna fight a fuckin' legendary phoenix.
"How deep does that rat dungeon run?" Azuma muttered, staring in still slight awe at the phoenix.
Taga had told him before how the rat dungeon had ties with lower-level floors, which was how they prevented their merchants from getting murdered for their goods, but to casually hand out a literal phoenix was pushing the boundary.
"I told ya it's very well connected," Taga grunted, "It's a give-and-take relationship. The dungeon supplies things that some dungeons can't get, and they supply things they can get easily in return. Some crazy strong bastard on a deep floor probably had no problem beating this guy, and then traded him with a merchant for somethin' he needed."
Yeah, I'm definitely not going down anytime soon.
Having to live in fear of gods who could smush him like a bug in the DxD Realm was bad enough, but there were also just as powerful beings lurking below him in the Dungeon Realm too.
But, I can't be worried about that right now.
"I've got a fucking Phoenix!"
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
AN: Thank you for reading! Azuma can't train with or appreciate Saber right away, because then he wouldn't be Azuma… (Don't worry, he does next chapter)
Also - SUBMIT NAMES FOR THE PHOENIX! If you don't, then it's getting an Azuma-esque name (which no one wants to see…)
Also x2 - I'm going to try to update this story twice a week instead of once! (I get busy sometimes, BUT I WILL TRY!)
Also x3 - As always, you can read a bunch of chapters ahead (which is constantly increasing) on Patreon.com/Koyon !