SIX DAYS LATER
Aster's golden eyes silently watched the stars peeking through the bars of his cell and bathed in the heavenly light. His silver hair glistened with its splendor and made it seem like he was aglow. He didn't know how long he had stood there. The only indication of passing time was the summer sun slowly disappearing behind the horizon and being replaced with a crescent moon. Now that the sun had settled behind the harbor, the sweltering heat was slowly replaced by the cool air allowing a small breeze to enter his holding cell and giving him relief.
After he had given birth he had been sent back to the insufferable cell he had been placed in for the past eight months during his pregnancy. After spending nearly a year there, he was well acquainted with its four corners which he had somehow made his own. He knew the corner where the cool breeze entered best, as well where the music from DeLaRose was heard the clearest, and in some twisted way it had become like a second home to him. Exhausted, he walked towards his favorite wall and bent down to pick up the broken white chalk lying on the floor. He drew another white tally marking it the sixth day he'd been in there. Six tallies next to the other 246 days he'd marked before he started going into labor.
He leaned against the wall and slowly slid down. The walls of the cell remained the same as he had left them. The tallies had kept him company, as well as the baby in his stomach, and the drawings of animals he had drawn whenever he got bored. For instance, the drawing he made of a small bunny was named Little George who just so happened to be friends with the drawing of the squirrel right beside him named Sunny.
The white chalk was the only 'gift' Madam Rose had given him during his eight month stay along with the six new extra days he had been held since his labor. He smiled at his predicament, and thought, if somewhere out there was someone having a worse day than he was, he'd really like to meet them and maybe have a talk with them. That'd be nice.
He closed his eyes and meditated in prayer the way his parents had taught him long ago. The memories were so scattered that it was difficult to remember any of it, but it calmed his nerves and distracted him from the uncomfortable pain he felt in his chest. His breast and the milk it had produced felt like it had dried up like stones. The pain was unpleasant, but not unbearable; however, it didn't lighten his mood any further. It was a reminder of the baby he couldn't feed. The baby he had not seen since the day he had been ripped from his arms. It took every ounce of him not to go crazy. He tried not to think about what Madam Rose was capable of doing, but somehow his thoughts betrayed him over and over again. When he realized he was teetering over the edge of a complete meltdown he would sing a lullaby and calm himself down. He'd lost track of how many times he had sung it. Over and over like a prayer. A lifeline.
The only news he received about his child was through Fiona and Jonah who had been able to sneak him a message once, informing him the baby was being taken care of and not to worry. But how could he not? Especially now, as he closed his eyes and concentrated, trying to call forth the thread, the shining single chord, that connected his cor to his son.
In a matter of seconds, Aster managed to see into the ethereal plane and watched the golden chord aimlessly floating, gently and most fragile, almost gracefully against the expansive nature of the ethereal abyss. He gathered the energy within his own golden cor and lovingly pushed forth his calming energy. Despite their distance, he hoped his energy would reach his baby's tiny cor on the other end. He did these actions every other hour, in the hopes that the child could respond back, and in some cases he had felt small tremors inside his cor as if in response. It felt like his baby was reassuring him, "It's okay mommy. I'm here."
However, this time he didn't receive such a reply, and he wanted nothing more than to hold his baby in his arms. He took a deep breath. There he was again. Teetering.
Honestly, he wished he could just scream. Wouldn't it be liberating? He wanted to scream. In his dreams he screamed.
Just as these thoughts began to consume his mind he heard the sound of approaching heels, heavy, and unmistakable. He didn't even need to look to know who it was. Madam Rose's domineering figure stood outside the cell as her cold dead brown eyes stared down at him through the metal bars. She wore a red gown that flowed down ever so gracefully and wore a pair of matching gloves and hat that made her bewitching. Her face was ever so lovely despite her years. And had she been as kind as her face was lovely then she would have been adored by the omegas currently working under her. However, that was not the case, and when it came down to knowing the machinations or the truth of Madam Rose's life, one would rather be dead than find out.
No one knew her story besides those that were closest to her. And even then, it was a stretch to suggest that even people like her own sons, Kendel and Berto, would know an inkling of their own mother's life.
This was the first time Madam Rose had made an appearance after his labor so he waited for her to speak. It was only fair. He had no desire to speak to her, much less look at her. In any case, he felt that if he began to say anything, he would actually break down. He had reached a point he'd never reached before. Not with her…certainly he had never felt as vulnerable as he did now. He detested the feeling of looking weak in front of her. He'd done it once and vowed never to do it again.
Instead, he opted to ignore her and it was this very small action that made the older woman scoff. She began with bitterness in her voice, "Now that your virtue is gone you're worthless to me. However, there are still many noblemen and noblewomen who would pay a good sum to sleep with a Helderian such as yourself. Even you must know that much is true."
She tapped the cell lightly and the sound seemed to echo between them as if to amplify his impending consequence. She continued, "I'll make sure to whore you out to your bitter last breath. It's what you wanted. After I treated you so preciously, so carefully, and this is how you chose to repay me. You could have lived lavishly and bedded the very best, but you squandered it away like it was nothing. Do you think this is something to be joyful about? Do you realize how many would have killed to be in your position?"
She stood quiet as if to allow these words to sink in before she spoke, "I'll make your life a living hell if you decide to keep that baby."
"I know."
Madam Rose's gaze hardened at his quiet and resilient response and replied back, "Do you now?"
Aster finally turned and met her gaze. His golden eyes glowed with grave intensity; they made Madam Rose want nothing but to destroy them. How dare this filthy omega stare at her in such a manner. But she had also known that Aster had always been a rare gem, one she had tried molding to her likes and dislikes. If someone ever did ask, one could even say that she had seen him as her most beloved pet. Something to look after and treat well when it behaved good, and punish when it bit back. Oh, and Aster had bit back and had left a deep scar.
She continued, "Well, I guess your rarity counts for something despite all you have done. And imperial law stops me from doing anything heinous. So, I suppose that son of yours, even if you keep him does belong to me, " she smiled and her voice came out smooth like venom, "so when he comes of age, how much do you suppose they will pay to bed the progeny of one of the last known Helderians? Either way, whether I sell the child or keep him, I profit, don't I?"
Aster glared at her with vicious hatred in his eyes. However, Madam Rose wasn't one to back down and so she continued as if to drive his despair down further, "Oh but I would have to play the long game won't I? Wait until he's of age…that's such a long time away. But, my patience is unmatched. After all, I waited for you to come of age."
She smiled smugly down at him and observed his shabby appearance. Her pitiful eyes took in his dirty dress and his gaunt appearance. In days past, nobody could have imagined Aster in this way. He had always worn the best garments, displayed the prettiest jewels, and paraded like a delicate doll.
She clucked her tongue and began, "I waited and looked where it got me. Disappointment after disappointment that's all you've been to me."
Aster blinked. He hated how his heart sank at her words. Even now, he felt entangled to her whims. He hated this part of himself. He could only speak back, "My pleasure, always."
Madam Rose clenched her jaw and could have killed him with her gaze had she been able to, but Aster wouldn't back down. He had lived with this woman for so long that it was impossible for him not to answer back against her authority.
He gracefully stood up to meet her at her eye level and finally broke his silence , "No matter what you promise me, be it riches or freedom, I will not abandon him."
Madam Rose scoffed, "Are you willing to take on all the responsibility? Do you even know what it is you are proposing? You'll eventually choke on those words. I'm telling you this because I love you, and I don't wish to see you get hurt more than you already have."
In that moment, the clouds covered the moonlight and darkness swallowed the cell as Aster met the woman's gaze. Aster had contemplated 246 days and an additional six, and he was left with a single question.
Would his child have a better life outside these walls or within them?
If he let go of the child then he, as a mother, wouldn't be able to live with that fact. His own selfishness to keep the child had led him to this very moment. He had thought about it over and over in his head until his own cor began to dwindle from exhaustion.
If the child was taken away to live somewhere far away from this hell, and be settled in some orphanage like the rest of the children born under DeLaRose then his baby would have a better chance at happiness. That much, Aster was able to discern. However, it was also a truth that the child would grow to resent him, and forever think he had been abandoned. He would grow up to feel no parental love and have no one to rely on. Aster knew most of all what that kind of lonely existence entailed. And what hurt him most as a mother was that his child would never know he had been loved and always be loved by Aster the very moment he was born into this world.
But what would happen if he didn't let him go? Would the child grow to hate him for letting him stay in this hell? Would he forever curse him for never giving him a chance to survive outside these walls? All that Madam Rose said would eventually come to pass. He would never be free under her grasp. But Aster was selfish because he wished to keep him. He wanted to keep him. He wanted to sing his baby lullabies, and whisper that he loved him, and hold him with so much care and love. He was selfish, so stupidly selfish. He had shed blood, sweat, and tears of pain to have him enter this world. He was the first thing Aster had ever been proud of.
He was so selfish because he knew that he couldn't give him everything under Madam Rose's watch. He shouldn't have even thought about it.
He was truly selfish.
Aster opened his mouth and his voice broke despite himself, "I'll take responsibility…I just want my son."
Madam Rose sighed as if she had expected it, "If anything happens in the future you have no one to blame but yourself. And since you have kept silent and I'm sure will stay silent about the matter, I'll make sure to weed out the bastard that impregnated you and have them whipped till the bone marrow shows and have them bleed out upon the cobblestones. That I promise you with certainty."
Aster remained silent.
With that single promise, Madam Rose turned on her heel and walked off. She turned her back on Aster, like he had done to her months ago. This decision would no doubt have its consequence and her walking away only cemented this fact. Before she disappeared down the hall her voice resounded out a name like an order, "Berto."
As if awaiting her command, her second son, Berto came walking forth from the right side from whence she had disappeared, and carried the baby in his arms. Aster's eyes widened and slowly glistened, but it was the sound of the small cooing from the child that made him want to break down.
Teetering.
Aster closed his eyes, willing his own tears to go back wherever they had climbed themselves out from. Berto opened the cell door which made a loud rickety scraping sound, startling the child to cry.
Aster reached for his baby before Berto got the door fully open and managed to place him gently into his own arms. He lovingly rocked the baby to calm him down. The child's tiny arms extended out from the green soft blanket as it cried. He was so light and so warm, and he was here. He was with him.
Aster's love blossomed and he sent loving tremors from his own cor down to the child's. And as if by kindred spirits, as if the child knew he was in his mother's arms, its crying ceased. His little crying hiccups slowed down and then his big bright eyes stared into Aster's and just like his very own, they held the same honey golden luster.
Aster glanced over at Berto standing a few feet away. Madam Rose's son quietly and carefully opened the rest of the cell's door in order to not startle the baby once more. Aster shared a smile with the second son as if proud to present the most beautiful thing in the world. Berto kindly smiled back as if he could tell what Aster was thinking, and that he indeed was lucky to partake in such a beautiful sight.
Aster kissed his baby's forehead and spoke softly, "He looks nothing like me."
Berto gazed at the child and then at Aster, "But he's got your lovely eyes."
Aster warmly smiled at Berto's response and walked out of the cell with the child in his arms. He was finally free from the confines of his tiny prison, and for the first time in a long time, he walked under the night sky where the moonlight cast a gentle glow upon the mother and his darling son.