Lila looked at me for a few moments, her eyes widened just a small bit.
Geez, is it really that surprising that I wanted to-- Yeah, never mind, not gonna finish that train of thought...
She finally looked away after a few moments, now starting to bite at her bottom lip whilst in thought. She was obviously debating with herself on whether or not to confide in me.
Eventually, something within her gives and she lets out a deep sigh.
"I tried..." She says, her head low and her voice soft. "I tried to push past it... To act like everything is normal... To act like nothing has changed..."
"And what is it that's changed exactly?" I asked.
"Everything!" She suddenly exclaimed, surprising me with her sudden outburst, before her head sinks back down. "Everything's changed... Before, all I worried about was taking care of planets... make sure their inhabitants are safe... stealing rice balls from South..."
That last part causes her to crack a small smile that seemed to be of fond remembrance before it immediately fell off her face.
"But all of that is gone. I came back, but I'm not sure if there was anything to come back to..."
Nothing to come back to...
"What about Shin?" I asked, bringing up her last remaining friend. "He's still around, living and breathing. Why don't you just go and see him?"
"It's been millions of years, Zyleth." She replied, shaking her head. "If I went back, all I would be is a burden. I would have to relearn all the planets, all of their species, their ways of life..."
"Not necessarily. Remember how I said that Shin takes a laid back approach to universe governing now?"
"But that isn't my way. It isn't the way I was taught." She retorts, shaking her head at me this time. "Daikaioh taught us that Kais were supposed to nurture the life we create. That we must look after our creations and guide them as if they were our own children. I wouldn't be able to accept Shin's way. All I would be if I went back is a Kai without any purpose..."
I guess it was just wishful thinking for me to think that her problems would go away after just one conversation. And to be honest, I understand where she's coming from.
Her family is gone. The universe she knew is gone. Her way of life is gone. Every single aspect of the life she had was essentially gone. I revived a person who's been dead for eons and expected her to just get along as if nothing had changed.
As if life hadn't carried on after she had died.
I didn't take this scenario into consideration when I revived her. I didn't take into account that not everyone is like me.
They can't just suddenly be thrown into the ass end of an unknown universe and be expected to just paddle their way up to the surface. And that's essentially what I had done to her.
"I'm sorry." I said to her.
She suddenly turns and looks up at me with widened eyes, not having expected me to suddenly apologize.
"Why are you apologizing?" She asked.
"Because if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't be in this situation right now." I replied, my tone genuinely remorseful. "Feeling like you're in a universe you don't belong in..."
"Don't do that." She shook her head. "I don't blame you. It's not your fault that everything changed the way it did. That's the way of life. The only thing you've done is make me realize just how much everything's changed."
"How do you mean?"
"Your people... Their history... It all made me realize just how long I've been gone." She says.
"I'm sorry." I apologize once more.
"Stop apologizing. I told you that isn't your fault." She says as she turned to look over the beautiful landscape. "You Saiyans are nothing short of a marvel. A whole race with the potential to become so much... I would've loved to have watched over you all..."
The words she spoke take me by surprise, and can you really blame me? Someone heard all about our history, our bloodied past, our capability for violence, and they thought we were a marvel?
Sure, it's one thing for a fan of Dragon Ball to think so, but for a Kai who actually manufactured the Seventh Universe to think we were?
If she didn't sound so genuine, I would have thought she was just saying that to make me feel better.
"You're serious?" I asked.
"Of course." She says, a wide smile on her face. "How could I not be? Sure, your history is nothing short of barbaric, but it's beautiful in some parts."
I couldn't help but scoff at that part.
"What part of our history could ever be classified as beautiful?" I asked, shaking my head softly.
"Six Saiyans coming together to battle against their brethren, overcoming their evil nature and becoming the first mortals to ever achieve something that us Kais thought to be impossible. A mortal becoming a god. Even if they failed, I would've loved to have seen it." She answered, looking at me with a soft smile. "I loved watching over planets... Seeing their people grow more and more..."
I think I'm starting to realize why she had such a negative reaction now.
"So the reason why you suddenly left isn't because of how much has changed, but-"
"How much I missed..." She says with a small nod. "I've tended to thousands upon thousands of planets. Cared for them, watched over them... And now I'm realizing that all those planets are gone. That all the people that I've cared and watched over are nothing more than dust scattered throughout the universe."
So she didn't leave because she was overwhelmed by all the things that I had said, but rather because she was reflecting on just how much time she lost.
And here I am, explaining the history of the Saiyans as if they were just another run-of-the-mill species, when back in her time, there was probably nothing even close to what us Saiyans were capable of.
I really got to learn how to read people's emotions better...
She shook her head and let out a solemn sigh, "I'll never get the chance to witness their history..."
Her words cause me a bit of grief. She seemed to genuinely loved and cared for those under her watch.
Like a genuine mother...
"I'm sorry." I said as I stood up on my feet. "For everything you've lost, and for everything you've missed out on."
"I told you, it isn't your f-"
"But maybe you should look at it from a different perspective." I said, cutting her off.
She looks up at me, her gaze filled with both confusion and curiosity.
"What do you mean?" She asks.
"You've missed out on so much, I won't deny that. But for everything you've lost, you've now got something new to discover. New planets. New inhabitants on those planets. New cultures and lands to look upon and experience."
She looks down and shakes her head again, "I told you, I'm not fit to be a Kai. Not with the way Shin watches over the universe."
"I never said anything about being a Kai." I said to her, which causes her head to snap up to me. "You don't have to be a Kai to explore the universe. You can do that all on your own. Probably even more so without the restrictions that would come with being a Kai."
"Is... Is that even possible?" She asks. "For me to just... not be a Kai anymore?"
"Who knows?" I shrugged. "It's not like I'm an expert on the matter."
If Zamasu could exterminate all mortal life without the gods or the angels interfering, I'm sure they couldn't give two shakes of a rat's ass about a a single lone Kai fucking off and doing her own thing out in the universe.
Especially since, by their own accounts, she's dead.
Doesn't matter what she does if she's considered a dead woman.
"But I think it's better than doing nothing." I said, smiling down on her.
She looks at me incredulously, probably wondering if I'm actually serious or not. After a moment, she turns away and looks over the land once more.
A few agonizing moments of silence went by before I suddenly hear her whisper, "Okay..."
"Yeah?" I asked, holding out my hand towards her.
She looks back towards me, seeing my hand and nodding with a small smile on her face.
"Yeah." She nods, grasping my hand.
I pull her up to her feet and we both look at each other with resolute faces.
"So, what's your first order of business now that you're a free Kai, Lila?" I asked.
She smiled and shook her head before turning towards the view, "Well, first we're going to name this planet. It's a shame that a beautiful world like this doesn't have an equally as beautiful name."
"Fair enough." I said, looking at her with an amused smile. "And then what?"
Her eyes glance at me briefly as the wind blows, she tucks a strand of stray hair out of her face and turns towards me.
"And then I'm going to make you the strongest damn Saiyan in all of history." She declared with a bright smile.
My eyes widened as I stared at her, the light radiating from the planet's star shining through the clouds makes it look as though she had a halo made of pure light.
[Word Count: 1,607.]